Fear of “The Other”

Don’t think hes not watching!

Let’s dive right into Mark 12:30-31, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these.” (Emphasis is mine, but it should be anyone who claims to be a person of faith.) How have we strayed so far from this commandment that God said was most important? Maybe it wasn’t before this era of social media and biased news, but it is now.

What we now have is what has been recently termed “contact bias,” which is described by Brian McLaren as a form of prejudice or stereotyping that arises from a lack of sustained personal contact or interaction with people who are different from oneself. Without real-world, meaningful exposure, individuals’ preconceived notions and false assumptions about the “out-group” remain unchallenged and are free to flourish. In this way, the prejudice cycle spins on, unchallenged across generations. As prejudice persists, it becomes embedded in cultures and institutions, creating systems of racism and hatred, marginalizing groups who are stigmatized, dehumanized, scapegoated, exploited, oppressed, or even killed. https://cac.org/daily-meditations/overcoming-contact-bias-2021-03-04/#:~:text=Overcoming%20Contact%20Bias-,Thursday%2C%20March%204%2C%202021,for%20who%20they%20truly%20are🙂 

Today, fear and mistrust are growing and being reinforced by the news and social media. Violence against our brothers and sisters never seems to abate, and neither does discrimination, which can be cruelly subtle. We strip our fellow human beings of their dignity when they are suffering, and we refuse to involve ourselves in their lives. How easy it is not to notice the misery of others! Will we ever find our way back to God, who loves everyone, welcomes the stranger, and calls us to open our hearts to those the world casts aside?

Since I really enjoy sharing the times I have been less than loving to strangers, here is one of my favorite examples: In January of 2005, my husband and I were blessed with the opportunity to travel to Belfast, Northern Ireland, and spend a year there working for Habitat for Humanity.

We lived close enough to the City Center to walk there on occasion. One morning, I decided to go to the post office and mail some letters before continuing on to work. My time was limited that day, so I moved faster than usual. 

As I walked down Falls Road, I noticed a very small woman, or girl, lying on the sidewalk. Several people had passed her by without a glance…and so did I. A few yards later, however, my conscience began slowing me down. “Go back,” it said. Although at first I tried not to respond to it, the call became more persistent. I went back.

Dropping my mail on the sidewalk, I sat down beside her. At first, I thought she was sleeping, but I soon realized that she had passed out. Nudging her, I prayed for a response so I wouldn’t feel even more guilty if she was dead. She gradually regained consciousness and sat up next to me. When I asked her what I could do for her, she pushed me away: “Leave me alone.”

“Sorry, but I can’t do that. You’re not safe lying on the street. I’ll get a cab, and we’ll find you something to eat.” 

“Look at me!” she demanded. “It’s useless! Leave me alone!”

“What’s your name?”

“Karen”

Well, Karen, I am looking at you, and I see a beautiful creation of God”. My words were firm, but my heart was aching. She continued to insist that she wasn’t worth my trouble, or God’s trouble, and I continued to insist that she was wrong.

“Do you have a fag?”

“No,” I replied. “I don’t smoke. Smoking is bad for your health.” At that, both of us laughed. 

Just as I was preparing to hail a cab and take Karen to a restaurant, a minivan pulled up, and a young man got out, addressing her by name. He then gently helped her up and walked her to the van. I asked if there was a number I could call to check on her, but he said no. However, he took down my phone number so that she could call me if she wanted to.

Then, after they left, I resumed my walk to the post office, while questioning God, “Lord, what just happened? I’m certain I’ll never hear from Karen again. What was the purpose of all of this?” And as I continued to walk in silence, I could feel God speaking to my heart: “Linda, next time, don’t pass Me by.” OUCH!

THANKSGIVING: Thanks-is what we say. Giving-is what we do

Thanksgiving has arrived, and, as usual, I have to ask myself: “Self, are you any more thankful this year than any in the past?” And that annoying Self replies…BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

This post will probably be my shortest ever. You’re welcome. It was prompted by a request from my daughter-in-law to dredge up a news article from 2009 about a kidney donation.

So, here’s the video: https://youtu.be/yZYyW3_KVms?si=1TWGdEM0wyeT02iG

The reason it made the national news was because it involved fourteen people; a fourteen way swap of seven kidneys.  It was the first time it was ever done and was made possible because of a new procedure that would allow recipients to receive a non-compatible kidney from a donor.

The funny part was when I had that initial conversation with my daughter-in-law I assumed I would just drop my kidney off at the hospital in a brown paper bag and they would give it to the next person in line. But, no, that’s not how it happened. Someone on the transplant team contacted me and explained that it would be on the news, but they would respect my privacy if I wanted to remain anonymous. After thinking about it I agreed to allow my story to be made public if it would help others consider doing it as a living donor. And the rest is history as they say.

I am posting this right before Thanksgiving in hopes it will call to mind Luke 12:48, which reminds us that we have been given so much and are expected to give back to others. Are we doing that? I don’t think he was specifically talking about an extra kidney, but who knows.

When you sit around that table, look at all you have, smile at the family and friends you have been blessed with, recite your usual prayers right before you dig in, take a nap, or watch football, are you thinking of and feeling grateful because you spent some of this year caring for those who have nothing, gracing the lost with the truth of God’s love, lifting up those who have been cast aside, not giving from your excess of time and money, but like the poor widow, sharing your last few pennies?  

Unless you have been living in a cave over this past year, you know you don’t have to look to the suffering in third-world countries to do God’s work. American children are still going hungry. Many immigrants have been ripped from their families and treated inhumanely.  Do we care enough to express our thankfulness by offering compassionate care in a way that makes a difference to others?

Luke 21: 1-4 tells us,” And He looked up and saw the rich putting their gifts into the treasury, and He saw also a certain poor widow putting in two mites. So He said, “Truly I say to you that this poor widow has put in more than all; for all these out of their abundance have put in offerings for God, but she out of her poverty put in all the livelihood that she had.”

Please know, I was reluctant to share my story here because I’m not suggesting you run out and hand over a kidney in order to reap rewards in heaven. And actually, what I did was far less than those countless heroes  who have sacrificed their lives for others! They had only one life to give, I still have another kidney and sixteen years later, it’s working just fine!

Have a Blessed Thanksgiving!

Perfectly Imperfect

Two things (and a few additions along the way) set me on a journey that I would like to share with you: The book, “One Year to Live” by Stephen Levine, and “A Course in Miracles – Made Easy”, by Allen Cohen.

Spending each moment, each day, as though I only have this one year to live is not a stretch for me. I contemplate my death at times (come on, that’s not so crazy!) trying to realize how precious life is, how fleeting it is, and how much of it I have wasted.

The challenge of “One Year to Live” is to focus on the moment, not the past or the future. To consider what is really important and what is not, to leave a richer legacy for those I leave behind, and to have no regrets. All of which I do fairly well at times and suck at most of the time.

“The Course” promises to take me even deeper. “Mastering the journey from fear to love”.  I pray to be ever present to all God has to teach me along the way.

Levine considers this process “a restoration of the heart when we confront our life and death with mercy and awareness. A year-long experiment in healing, joy, and revitalization.”

(ACIM) “Every moment offers us a choice between fear and love. Fear hurts and love heals. There are no other choices. Answer fear with love and you will find the peace you seek.”

Just this short introduction to both these books has made it so clear that I have wasted more time in the past, in the negative, and in fear than I want to admit. God has given me this precious life, meant to be beautiful, abundant, and rich, and I have tasted such a small sample of it. But I’m still here, still breathing and I can begin again, and again.

(SL) “A year to live gives a person the power to heal that which remains unloved.” I have believed the lies that I am unworthy of love since childhood. I am always on guard to protect a fragile ego that I have created myself. The truth that longs to set me free from these lies is the fact that I am a child of a loving God; made in his image. I am not a worthless, invisible mess, and neither is anyone else. I don’t need to defend an image that is not reality and I don’t need to attack others to protect it.

(SL) “There are two main elements that constitute the foundation of this life’s renewal, (1) exploration of what has gone before and a way of clearing a path for what is to come, and (2), to become more present, more mindful of the process we call life.”

(ACIM) “When you challenge God as to how the world will be changed, his answer is: Through you. You bring the presence of God to the world simply by being yourself (your true self, not the self you created). Each time you choose, your choice is your evaluation of yourself.”

Stephen Levine says that this year should empower me to finally heal that part of me that still feels unloved. The part that is often unloving. Living the lies of the past powerfully impacted the present. What are my limiting beliefs that keep me stuck there? If can recognize them I can change them to empowering and positive beliefs.

All of this work to become aware and to let go of the past, is critical to the work God would have me do. Now I realize that my negative beliefs color my life and rob me of the love, joy and peace that are my birthright.

Yes, I make mistakes (DUH!). It is fear that keeps us from living fully and joyfully in the present. Why is it so hard to believe that God wants to use me (ME!) as a witness to his love?

If all of this isn’t challenging enough, I was also introduced to Marianne Williamson’s book, “The Gift of Change” which refers often to “A Course in Miracles”. Her book is so powerful and reaches to the depth of my being.

Then, I had the blessing of meeting for lunch with a dear friend who introduced me to Christine McDonald. Her story of being sex trafficked for almost twenty years, the drugs and homelessness, physical abuse and often torture, the sense of hopelessness and then the powerful way God moved in her life is a story beyond anything we could ever imagine. And her beautiful spirit is something to behold! I have read her book, “The Same Kind of Human” (which was being considered for a movie at the time).

Sometimes I question if I read too many things at one time. But then I think of it as having several friends and each has a unique relationship with me. All the books I am reading are speaking to that same depth of my heart but in different, unique ways. All sharing one important message, “You’ve got work to do, Linda”. So, shake off your doubts, acknowledge your fears and then let them go. I have plans for you and you’re not getting any younger – just sayin’”.

These teachings have been challenging to say the least. For sure, they are helping  guide me on this journey of change, renewal, awareness, and conviction. Conviction that now is the time. That whatever God has planned for me, whatever steps I have taken to this point, are all converging for a reason. I truly believe that the next adventure I sign up for, and I don’t even know what it is yet, will be my most significant. Ever!

Here is the common theme I see with these authors: meditation and contemplative practice are to be our most critical focus. Then, we focus on how that will be done. Those two things will demand more time and attention than I have ever given to anything.

To that end, I am compelled now to set all else aside and focus on God and on our relationship. That means more time sitting in his presence. Quietly. That’s huge for me! And listening – I’m so bad at listening!

Until now I could never have imagined such intensity of purpose. Fear has always kept me at a safe distance from it. But God has finally broken through this hard shell around my fragile heart.  I thought I had to be perfect for him to love me. But, he has shown me that I have misunderstood what Jesus meant by” perfection” in Matthew 5:48, which has been the cause of my pain and suffering because I felt I never measured up. The wholeness God offers us has nothing to do with perfection.

If we interpret Jesus’ saying, “You must be as perfect as God” through the lense of most religious teachings that has to mean that we can never, ever, ever sin. EVER! – then there’s no hope for any of us.

But many Scripture Scholars don’t believe that was what Jesus meant. Besides, if it was, and we became that perfect human what would we need God for? God knew we would all “sin and fall short”. It’s the nature of humanity.  So, let’s insert the word “strive”. Strive for perfection and when you screw up, which you will, seek God’s forgiveness, which he will, and move along.

I will end with something that will hopefully help you, as it has me: GET OVER YOURSELF! You’re welcome.

Linda, Listen to ME!

(tenor gif)

I know many people, and I’ll bet you do too, perhaps even you, who can’t believe God has a plan for them. Over the years, I have encountered people who don’t believe me when I tell them my story. “Oh, really?! God told you to do that, huh? Right!”  

To be honest, I wouldn’t have believed it myself if he hadn’t gradually brought me to a place where I could trust him, even if I was fearful and had no idea what he was up to. Which, frankly, is still most of the time.

God has always longed to grow me into the person he meant me to be. It was me resisting, me not being present to him, me missing the mystery and majesty that surrounded me because I was just too busy to notice, or more likely, too afraid. So instead, I skipped along, trying to drown out his voice, “Lalalalalalalala, I can’t hear you!”

For years, there were little promptings that, in hindsight, proved to me he was on the job (Romans 8:28). Then bigger ones that required more trust and offered way more grace than I deserved. God opened my heart in ways I could not have imagined.

Though I still mess up – and often – I know God’s response is out of love for me; his admonishments tell me that he loves me too much to let me stay stuck in my messiness.

 We are so used to being in a world that is loud and demanding of our attention. We busy ourselves filling in uncomfortably quiet places. That’s how we miss God’s “still small voice” or “gentle whisper” (1 Kings 19:12). Sure, he’s good at those show-stopper whirlwinds and earthquakes and fire. Even what I have called 2×4 moments but didn’t leave marks like the ones my mother inflicted.

Because of her, I was always on guard for those “laying down the law” whacks that I expected from God, too, when I messed up. However, I believe he speaks more often through the Spirit’s whispers of pure grace.

We can become so enmeshed in and blinded by the things of this world that we miss our whole purpose for being here. So if you are going through life day after unremarkable day, schlepping through the same routine to ad nauseum – STOP IT! Your life has a purpose that God depends on you to fulfill. You matter that much!

We are all called to holiness, called to use the gifts and talents already given us for God’s kingdom work right here – right now. It just takes awareness on our part. (I would highly recommend Anthony DeMello’s book by the same name, “Awareness”).

Leo Tolstoy’s novel, “The Death of Ivan Ilyich,” considered a masterpiece, was written just after his own “profound spiritual awakening” and conversion experience.

While lying on his deathbed, Ilyich ruminated about the reality that his entire life was superficial and self-serving, and he profoundly stated, “Maybe I didn’t live as I should have done.” In the end, he posited a question that Tolstoy must have pondered himself, “What if I really have been wrong in the way I’ve lived my whole life, my conscious life?” Oops, a little late, buddy!

It was too late for Ilyich, but not Tolstoy. He discovered his purpose and rejected his aristocratic life to follow Jesus’ teachings – particularly the Sermon on the Mount. Years later, his writings had a profound impact on Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., and countlessothers.

Soooooo, what are you waiting for? You must still be breathing, or you wouldn’t be reading this. That’s a start. Incredibly, no matter how you lived your life to this point, it’s not too late to begin again. New beginnings are God’s specialty!

“To infinity and beyond!” God coined that phrase, you know. Don’t believe me? HUMPH! Check out Ephesians 3:20, “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.” 

Alrighty then, you’re pumped and ready to go, right? You’ve packed your sandals and camel hair coat and checked Google Maps – for what? A sign from God?

(free bible images)

Stop! Take a deep breath. Maybe start by sitting quietly with God and waiting.

Don’t look to anyone else to give you a formula or a checklist to send you on your way to your destiny. But I willtell you this: You cannot love and serve others (which is our greatest calling) until you can love yourself.

And you can’t love yourself by utilizing any of the myriad self-help books on the market. You can only do that by growing in the knowledge that you are deeply and passionately loved first by the God who created you!

And you can only do that by being in relationship with him, which requires your time and attention. You are his son/daughter with whom he is well-pleased (Matthew 17:5). Let that sink in. We are all deeply loved sinners. It’s high time we act like it, don’t you think?

Absolutely, go to church, take the time to read scripture, and pray, But mostly, LISTEN! Geeeezzzzz, we’re so bad at listening.

Living One Wild, Beautiful, and Fulfilling Life

If someone approached you and demanded everything you have accumulated and cling to or they will kill you right where you stand, what would you be willing to die for? Anything? Would you quickly, without hesitating, hand it all over? I’m guessing you would. I would!

Martin Luther King said, “If a man has not found something worth dying for, he is not fit to live.” And he should know. His final words in his Mountaintop speech were prophetic as they seemed to predict his death, “We’ve got some difficult days ahead. Like anybody, I would like to live a long life. But I’m not concerned about that now. I just want to do God’s will. And he’s allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I’ve looked over and I’ve seen the Promised Land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people, will get to the Promised Land. And so I’m happy tonight; I’m not worried about anything; I’m not fearing any man.”

So, the question for us during these times of uncertainty and volatility becomes, what is worth dying for? I have a one word answer. Ready? Love. That’s it.

I don’t know about you, but my most profound moments of clarity come after attending funerals when I do a life review. If funerals don’t cause us to evaluate our own existence, I don’t know what will. We may still be standing at the grave site when the questions surface: Do I matter? Have I value? What is my legacy? Will anyone care when I’m gone? Has God really given me a purpose? What have I done to make the world a better place? Will I have to eat that crappy potato salad at the luncheon again? (Oh, sorry, I digress)

Today, we want absolute certitude about God even though it really isn’t possible because he is more mystery than we want to believe. Unquestioned religion is shallow and makes no demands on us. Which is fine with so many of us.

Faith has nothing to do with certitude, it’s a calculated risk, but we don’t like risk even if there is a high degree of probability. It’s too iffy. No thanks. Which I find pretty amusing considering the things some people will do for “fun”. Like, I don’t know, jumping off buildings, scaling walls, motorcycle stunts! And that’s not risky??

(AI generated)

A shaky questioning faith might be less cut and dry than mindlessly following a set of rules. It may be more uncontrollable and mysterious than what you have ever experienced, but that is what will bring you into the presence of Love and the very essence of God.

You may not have been told this but you’re allowed to wrestle with God; to question the reason for your pain and suffering, or the suffering and heartache in the world. He encourages us to bring to him the struggles within us. God’s tough. Trust me. He can take it!

I got so angry with him during a very difficult time in my life that I cried and shook my fist at him, “God, if you love me so much where were you when my mother was abusing me?! When I was being sexually abused?! Huh?”  I ranted on and on excusing my years of indifference to him because of all the suffering he allowed in my life.

What I got back from him was not a bolt lightning, which I was prepared for, but a gentle loving response that unsettled the very core of my being. “Linda, I did not abandon you during that time. I suffered along with you. My heart ached for you. I have lovingly, sorrowfully, held your tears. But, the choices people make are beyond my control. I’m truly sorry. But, you, my dearest daughter, have also sinned and fallen short. Even then, I never have I stopped loving you. I’m just waiting for you to trust me. Then, your healing will start and you will be able to forgive those who hurt you.”

You see, there are no church rules or dogmas that will ever bring us into that kind of deep abiding relationship with God, which, in turn will shine a light on our purpose in life. It is what we call “experiencing” God. Until we can let go of our need to “know” that God is real, we will never allow ourselves to open our hearts to experiencing him. It’s that simple and that critical. It’s no more complicated or profound than that!

William O’Malley nailed it when he said, Genuine religion begins – not as it did for most of us, with indoctrination and imposing worship but with a personally captivating experience, a “sense” of the numinous, a presence larger than the capacities of this world to produce.”

Frederick Buechner tells us, “The grace of God means something like: Here is your life. You might never have been, but you are because the party wouldn’t have been complete without you.”

You have to believe that you matter! That is what John Eldredge says, “If we could believe that about our lives, and come to know that is true, everything would change. We would be so much more able to interpret the events unfolding around us…. We would discover the task that is ours alone to fulfill. We would find our courage. The hour is late, and you are needed. So much hangs in the balance. Where is your heart?”

Alrighty then, we’re almost done. Now, I would like to offer you one last thing to contemplate before I go. Which of these scenarios would most likely keep you trembling in fear of screwing up and landing in hell or bring you right to the heart of God?

  1. All your years growing up, you were drug to “Church” by your parents. “Get up, clean up, sit quietly, don’t touch your brother, and act like this isn’t the most boring thing in your life! Then you’ll get donuts.” Then teachers of “religion” stepped in: “Memorize all the sins that will send you straight to hell. Miss one Mass – straight to hell. Think those dirty thoughts – straight to hell.” In short order that “little light of yours” was snuffed out! But you keep going. You keep getting your card punched on Sunday mornings when you’d rather be somewhere else. Not even the donuts appeal to you now.
  • Every day you encounter Someone (guess who) doing things that draw you to him: Feeding the hungry, comforting the dying, kissing the leper, dining with prostitutes and beggars. He is so sincere and passionate about what he’s doing that something incredible reaches deep down into the very core of your being and you can’t shake it. You are awe-struck, probably for the first time in your life, and you want to emulate him. You want to follow him. You want to sit at his feet and learn from him.

Go ahead. Choose. God’s waiting.

Only Man/Woman can Prove that God is Love

I’m taking this out of storage!

We are currently in the midst of incredibly challenging times. This is a truth that some may only whisper, perhaps in the hopes that it will all fade away. However, the reality is that it won’t. So, in the face of this reality, how do we move forward with any hope for our children and grandchildren’s future?

I believe it must begin with God – and acknowledging the fact that many doubt he even cares. It conjures up an image of him sitting in his heaven, feeling rejected by humanity and giving up on the whole lot of us. All while smacking his head and rethinking that “free will” idea of his.

Archibald MacLeish, an American poet and writer, powerfully explains what God may have hoped for by refusing to control us, “Man depends on God for all things: God depends on man for one. Without man’s love, God does not exist as God…and love is the one thing no one, not even God himself, can command. It’s either a free gift, or it’s nothing. And it is most itself, most free, when it is offered in spite of suffering, of injustice, and of death.” 

Do MacLeish’s words resonate with you? They certainly do with me. But believe me, I tried to deny that truth for a long time as I continuously prayed for God to “fix” this broken world and the people in my life who made me miserable. It never worked. Even though I believed my suffering was created by other people that I desperately wanted to control. Can you relate?

Well, dear ones, take heart because this broken ground we stand on is holy ground, and we are called to stay put, no matter how hard it seems. We are called to stand on that hilltop and emulate the LOVE that is God. We are to boldly and without apology declare that God has not abandoned us but is in our midst, cheering us on for the sake of his kingdom.

But the love of God will not manifest if we merely sing his praises in church to get that “I showed up every Sunday” card punched. God isn’t interested in our praises. He longs for us to show up in the midst of the brokenness that surrounds us and love those who suffer. If that seems scary, it’s understandable.

Think of the Desert Monks who went off into the wilderness and lived in caves. They prayed A LOT for the brokenness of the world, and I’m sure God loved their prayers. But I prefer to focus on why he sent Jesus into the world. It surely was meant as a wake-up call for us to come out of hiding. Just sayin’.

Yes, Jesus also went into the desert to pray when things were tough, but he didn’t stay there!  He offered his prayers to God, accepted his fate, and came out swinging! Remember that whole table-tossing event?

I believe that’s what God is calling us to do now:  to do what we can to care for the most innocent, those without a voice, those who suffer. This is no time to fret or worry about the outcome; there’s too much at stake.

It will likely be challenging and perhaps dangerous, but as that ever-pressing question goes, “If not us, then who?”

Like my hero, Esther, who knew she was called to a fate that would likely end her life. And her response? “WOOHOO, I will go, and, oh well, if I die, I die!” Okay, she probably wasn’t that thrilled, but she was determined to fulfill her purpose, and that should be our response to God’s call for us.

Oh, you don’t believe God has spoken to you about that? This may be where self-critical thinking is required. Is it possible you’re not listening? Is it possible you’re spending too much time whining and complaining about how others are making your life miserable, and you’re just sitting and waiting for God to take care of that first?  Then you’ll consider moving beyond your own selfish longings in the comfort of your shallow existence? Sorry, I guess that was mean. But is it true?

I know it was true for me for longer than I care to admit. And here’s the sad reality of that: my being so angry and hateful toward those who hurt me over so many years was probably worse in some instances than the injustices of others toward me.

My own actions likely provoked some of that. Like the time I threw a bar stool at a wall to get my husband’s attention! Yeah, I did that, and it worked for a millisecond. But I’m not proud of it and never used it on a resume as an example of my creative leadership skills!

No, I was not innocent and denied my own sinful behavior towards them. Of course, there would never be healing in our relationships until I was able to admit that. I needed to seek and offer forgiveness before healing was possible. Not wait for someone else to take the first step.

Healing the wounds of the world must begin by first repairing our personal relationships. Because if I claim to love God but do not love my neighbor, I am a liar, a noisy, clanging symbol (1 John 4:20). Ouch.

The Blessings, Beauty, and Boldness of Not-Quite

I am in a place in my life, that last bit of my journey, that rounding the corner and spotting the finish line, where I could easily bemoan my failings. I’m now certain it’s too late for, oh, I don’t know, running the New York City marathon or climbing Kilimanjaro. Beyond that, I don’t know.

The blessings of uncertainty

Uncertainty seems to be rejected by many Christians who see it as a weakness. Certitude, on the other hand, is what we subscribe to in a faith that makes God more acceptable and knowable, with no surprises lurking in the bushes. It offers a checklist of everything we need to do to “get to heaven” – Attend church weekly. Check. Tithe 10% of your earnings before expenses and frivolous spending. Check-ish. No cursing, snarkiness, or holier-than-thouness – on Sundays – the rest of the week is fine.

If you’ve checked those boxes, nothing more is expected of you – EVER! You can just go about your life any way you please. I can profess to having been all in with those “rules”. Until I wasn’t. That’s the point in my life when I looked back and saw the emptiness and shallowness of my existence. That’s when God spoke into my brokenness and showed me his equally broken heart because he knew he created me for more. The gifts and blessings he had given me sat unused because of fear and doubt that I was worthy of them.

In this place, I thought I could act as if God didn’t really care, and I could go about my life risk-free. But what if my denying that my life actually had a purpose turned out to be a no-good, very bad, nightmarish end? What then? Could I take my “followed all the rules” checklist to the gates of heaven, and they would open wide to me while the angels sang hallelujah? (BTW, heaven isn’t a place. You know that, right?) Anyway…

I ever so slowly began to sit with God and actually listen to his promptings to “go,” like Abraham. I trusted him—mostly. I also resisted my impulses to explain to him why whatever direction he was pointing me in was probably not a good idea. I reminded him of the litany of all my failings and wondered if someone else (think Moses) might be a better choice. Is Aaron still around?

Slow but steady change

I know exactly when I began to change. It was in 2001, on that momentous day, in the early morning, when God butted into my perfectly peaceful run and changed my life. I’ve told that story often, so I won’t bore you with it again, except to say that God has had me on a lot of adventures since then!

I have had many fits and starts and often questioned the wisdom of his guidance, only to see afterward how each experience changed and grew me in some way. They have each played a part in helping me to believe that God’s plan for each of us is perfect – always! And if you doubt that for a moment, let me share this incredible story about St. Benedict Joseph Labore. Everything in quotations is taken from the book SAINTS FOR SINNERS by Alban Goodier, S.J. https://www.ewtn.com/catholicism/library/st-benedict-joseph-labre-the-beggar-saint-5838.

The poor, homeless, beggar saint who never stumbled

Saint Benedict Joseph Labore was born into a wealthy family. His parents and fourteen siblings loved that lifestyle, but not Benedict. He rejected their obsession with fame and fortune – it disgusted him. So, off he went as a young teenager to make his own way, to discover his purpose. He was certain he was destined to be a monk. But it was a long road with many rejections and disappointments along the way.

He was first drawn to the Trappist Order as their ideas were contrary to what everyone else seemed to treasure. He applied to the La Trappe Abby, but when he arrived, they rejected him, stating that “He was underage, he was too delicate; he had no special recommendations.” But he didn’t give up. He applied to the the Carthusians of Montreuil only to be rejected once again. Still unwilling to give up, he applied to another Carthusain order. He was accepted but was soon rejected by them because “The monks grew uneasy; they feared for the brain of this odd young man. They told him he had no vocation, and he was dismissed.” Even after being rejected three times and being told he was simply not monk material, he was still resolute, knowing differently in his heart.

Undeterred, he began a year-long course of studies the Carthusians listed as the cause of his rejection. He reapplied, and they accepted him. But, again, it was short-lived, and they showed him the door. Still, he tried two more times for acceptance, to no avail.

So, at the age of twenty-five, undeterred and still determined to live his calling, he set off on his own, with nothing and no one to accompany him. He endured the extreme elements, ate what was given to him by the generosity of others, and he smelled – bad! But, somehow, he felt “no bitterness or disappointment” in this life of poverty that he embraced. He died a pauper at the age of thirty-four. Awww, too bad, you say? What a wasted life, you say? Wellll….

Here comes a miracle!

Word quickly got out that he died: “So great was the crowd that the guard of police had to be doubled; a line of soldiers accompanied the body to the church; more honor could scarcely have been paid to a royal corpse.

From the moment it was laid there, the church thronged with mourners….The throng all the time went on increasing. People of every rank and condition gathered there, at the feet of Benedict the Beggar. But the enthusiasm did not end with the funeral. Crowds continued to flock to the church, and soldiers were called out to keep order. At length the expedient was tried of closing the church altogether for some days. It was of no avail; as soon as the church was reopened, the crowds came again and continued coming for two months. Nothing like it had been seen before, even in Rome; if ever anyone was declared a saint by popular acclamation it was Benedict Joseph Labre, the beggar.”

Who am I to question God’s plan?

Now, I could easily compare St. Benedict’s story to my own meager efforts to use the gifts God has given me to serve and care for others. But what I have learned from this is that God isn’t asking for perfection. He has no expectations other than the offering of my “yes” to him and that I will do my best. The rest belongs to him. And the only thing I should long for at the end of my life are the words, “Well done!” Well done – indeed!

Empowering Faith in a Secular World

There are several examples in the Old and New Testament of people abandoning God and going their own way to do their own thing. Probably most notable for us is when Jesus was hauled away in the midst of his disciples – his friends – to be crucified. They instantly and collectively decided that was not something they signed up for and ran like hell.

Of course, the good news is that they came back stronger and more determined to follow Jesus’ example of God’s love for a broken world. This time they would not turn back. This time they would willingly die for him. And to that end, all but John became mortars. How do their lives compare with ours today? Well, the abandoning Jesus part lines up.

How did we get here?

Let’s start with statistics from the Pew Research Center: Today, about 28% of U.S. adults are religiously unaffiliated, describing themselves as atheists, agnostics, or “nothing in particular” when asked about their religion. In our latest data, 17% of “nones” identify as atheists, 20% say they are agnostic, and 63% choose “nothing in particular.”

Why?

When asked why they are not religious, two-thirds say they question a lot of religious teachings mainly because they don’t see those teachings lived out, or they don’t believe in God. “Many also bring up criticisms of religious institutions or people, including 47% who say that one extremely or very important reason why they are not religious is that they dislike religious organizations. And 30% say bad experiences they’ve had with religious people help explain why they are nonreligious.”

So, that doesn’t leave much more to dislike besides uncomfortable pews and bad music.

If you want to geek out on the research, here’s the link: https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2024/01/24/religious-nones-in-america-who-they-are-and-what-they-believe/

So, why does it matter?

Many researchers that have followed the attitudes of Gen Z’s, and Millennials in particular, believe it is linked decisively to Donald Trump’s election in 2016 and even more so in 2024.

I believe that if we have any chance of restoring care and compassion for each other and for those God calls us to love: the weak and vulnerable, we must open our hearts to those who have lost their way.

Matt. 5-14-16 tells us: “Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.

How do we do that?

I’m glad you asked. It’s not going to be easy because we have to start with our own understanding of God’s love and what he is calling us to, and then have the courage and conviction it will require.

Let me share a bit of my own story that might help. Thirty years ago – give or take – I was a Youth Minister. Each year, the school allowed us to speak to the seventh graders about the Youth Program and invite them to come. We would have an initial event to start the year. I knew some of the boys came because there were girls there, and visa-versa.

I didn’t care what got them there. I just hoped we could offer them something special that would keep them there. To that end, we offered two big events during the year, and they both had to do with serving others.

On Thanksgiving Day, we went to a church in the inner city and delivered meals to the poor. Then, during the summer, we went to Georgia for a week-long service project, helping paint and fix up homes in the poorer areas of a community. It was a huge endeavor that brought large numbers of kids from several states together. Every night we gathered for prayer and celebration. Our kids were blown away by all of it!

But, here’s the beautiful part: The result of those two experiences didn’t end there. The kids shared the impact on their own lives. Thanksgiving had a whole new meaning for them. When we came back from Georgia they couldn’t get enough of opportunities to serve their own community. They would come up with things to do. For example: we started what we called “Rake and Run”. We would go to the homes of the elderly, rake their leaves, bag them, and sneak away (they loved the sneaking away part!)

For years, I have watched kids sit in church bored to tears – if they actually showed up. I’ve seen some parents drop them off at church and leave. Some of those kids didn’t even go inside. Youth programs were few and far between. Like the adults, they were just expected to go for that hour to get their card punched. Like that would somehow magically convert them into lovers of Christ and become His “hands and feet” in this broken world.

Making a change will not be easy or quick

Our country is overrun by heathens who are already wreaking havoc and will continue to destroy everything in their path. God only knows where it will end and how many innocent people will suffer. But, I do know this: if we care, we must step out with courage and conviction that comes from God alone.

This is not a time for fear, anger, or timidity. It’s a time for action! It’s a time to live the Beatitudes as God intended:

Being Poor in Spirit means to act with humility not hatred.

Mourning – calls us to recognize our sins and the sins of others. Not only the sin of hatred that we harbor in our hearts but also the sin of culpability when we excuse the sins of others – to have the courage to call them out.  

Meekness – does not mean weakness, but to be submissive to the will of God, who calls us to love others.

Hunger and Thirst for Righteousness – this is a call not only for us to hunger for God, but as Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, and so many others, we are called beyond a hunger and thirst for God within ourselves, but also directed out to those who suffer.

Merciful – not simply feeling compassion for others in need. True, deep, inner compassion calls us outward to service and care for the most vulnerable.

Pure in Heart – not only speaks to what we do as believers but why we do it. The why informs our motivation.

Peacemaker – bringing people back to God, not by our words, but by our example.

Persecuted for Righteousness – If I am persecuted by others for loving and serving God then I am right where He wants me.

Are you ready?

God’s waiting for our response. He’s counting on us, with the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the examples of those in the trenches and those who have gone before us, like John Lewis, Never, ever be afraid to make some noise and get in good trouble, necessary trouble.”

Okay, I’m ready. Let’s do this!

The Ungrateful Poor

(Shutterstock Image)

In the years I worked with the homeless, I came to see what I had never seen before; the deep heartache of those cast aside, those we tend to ignore, look away from, or judge.

We may not know the circumstances of the people we encounter day-to-day: the poor struggling to survive or the homeless, who are more and more visible on the streets today. But God calls all of us to compassionate care. No exceptions! They are our brothers and sisters in Christ, no less deserving of value and dignity than we are. Rev Dr. Liz Theoharis calls them “God’s chosen nobodies.”

I have always been inspired by Dorothy Day. She and Paul Maurin began the Catholic Worker Movement in the 1930’s. She reminded everyone who came to serve with her, particularly those with an ego, that “There are two things you should know about the poor: they tend to smell, and they are ungrateful.” 

Why would she say that? Because if we have some expectation of their eternal gratitude for us taking our precious time to hand them a bowl of soup, we’ll be sorely disappointed and likely there for the wrong reason.

“Not all of us can do great things, but we can do small things with great love.” Saint Mother Teresa

 I believe God challenges us to sit with this stark reminder of how the poor and homeless are generally treated. Have you ever considered what happens to them when they die on the street? Jesus’s words in Matthew 25:40-45 should elicit shame in our hearts, “whatever you do to the least of these you do to me” – but does it?

It did for those who started the Homeless Remembrance Project in 2003. “We’ve stood for more than 2050 women, men, and children who have died! These are outdoor, public, or violent deaths only of presumed homeless and temporarily housed people!” 

Can you wrap your head around those numbers when considering their work is ONLY in a small area of Seattle, Washington? They define it as “A collaborative effort of homeless women, faith community leaders, designers, artists, social service providers, and other friends—working to create places of hope, healing, and beauty to honor and remember homeless people who’ve died in King County.

Our concept is twofold: the Tree of Life, in Victor Steinbrueck Park, is a sculpture with space for community gathering, hope, and healing to recognize that we are one people, homeless and housed together, and we can end homelessness. Leaves of Remembrance on Seattle sidewalks bear the names of those who have died, and we share their stories at the site Fallen Leaves.” https://homelessremembrance.org/

Luke 16:19-31 speaks to the massive gap between the rich and poor in America. Years of a growing obsession with independence, greed, and wealth accumulation have manifested indifference to the plight of the poor.

But some feel compelled to stop looking away and respond to God’s call to serve those who suffer. If you feel that call, I believe it first requires honesty about where you stand and, if there is a tug on your heart to serve, consider why.

What is your “why”? It’s an important question that deserves a great deal of reflection. Is it a response to an obligation you felt after last Sunday’s sermon, checking off the “volunteer” box? Is it a misguided notion that you are their “savior”? -because that job’s already taken.

Mother Teresa’s words should resonate with all who call themselves Christian, “It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish.” If that truth resonates deep within your heart, congratulations, you are on your way to fulfilling your life’s purpose!

Finding Hope in Crisis: Lessons from History

The disciples constantly nagged Jesus to tell them what was coming and what to expect, like the proverbial question from our kids: “Are we there yet?!

Jesus’s speaking to them in parables probably frustrated them even more. Those parables spoke to their unrelenting insistence on knowing what was coming and how to prepare. In Luke 21, Jesus simply tells them to be alert and wait for God to reveal his plan and purpose to them—all in due time. He tries to assure them that God is still in control, no matter how it seems.

Now, here we are, clutching our pearls since the election, certain the apocalypse is near! And just like the disciples, God calls us to the only assurance we need: He is still in control.

(Tenor GIF)

So, we all need to take a collective deep breath, exhale, and consider our reality in light of the work of those who are already moving to shore up our democracy and the words of those who have gone before us who fought the powers of evil in their own time. (I share an excellent resource at the end of this post)

Dr. Barbara Holmes offered her thoughts on the necessity of contemplation when a crisis arises: 

“The crisis begins without warning, shatters our assumptions about the way the world works, and changes our story and the stories of our neighbors. The reality that was so familiar to us is gone suddenly, and we don’t know what is happening….  

If life, as we experience it, is a fragile crystal orb that holds our daily routines and dreams of order and stability, then sudden and catastrophic crises shatter this illusion of normalcy. The crises … are usually precipitated by circumstances beyond the ordinary. I am referring to oppression, violence, pandemics, abuses of power, natural disasters, and planetary disturbances. 

Contemplation after or during crisis is a stillness in the aftermath of a primal scream, the abyss of unknowing, and the necessity of surviving the trauma together.”

So many of us are now in full crisis mode, and there is no telling how much worse it’s going to get over the coming years.

I believe people on both sides are dealing with their own life struggles. Fear and uncertainty are at the forefront of those concerns, and we can react differently to them. I get that.

The bottom line for me is that I am still called to love and care for others and to be an example of Christ in the world. How did I get here – from running around with my hair on fire to settling into acceptance of the reality we now face? How have I found hope and trust that we can overcome and end up stronger from the experience, even when we have no idea what will happen? I look to those heroes of faith who have gone before us.

There have been so many examples of those who faced seemingly impossible circumstances to make a difference in the world. I don’t pretend to be anywhere near their stature, but I hope to do what I’m called to do within my own capacity – to shine a light, even if it’s just a small candlelight, in the darkness.

As long as humans have been in existence, there has been violence and war somewhere in the world. Though we don’t know what to expect in the coming years in America, we see the innocent in Ukraine and the Middle East suffer untold horrors that we watch on our daily news feeds, and that’s frightening.

But, what we don’t see on the news is the stories of Ukrainians who courageously go about their lives in the midst of it. This is from an article by HOPE International, “Ukrainian believers continue to walk in God’s leading in times of war, just as they had done in times of peace. Despite the devastation Russia inflicts on their country, the Ukrainian spirit will not be broken. We will continue to see Ukrainian believers serving on the front lines of a courageous response, daily finding ways to love God and love their neighbors.” https://blog.hopeinternational.org/2023/06/28/the-heartbeat-of-hope-in-ukraine/

We, too, must trust in God each day to give us all we need, not to simply survive but to thrive and bring hope and care to those who suffer at the hands of evil. If not us, then who?

The following are amazing examples of that light in the darkness: Martin Luther King, Mahatma Gandhi, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Nelson Mandela, Anne Frank, Oscar Romero, and Jesus. Let’s not forget Jesus.

During the Vietnam War, Thomas Merton said, “We are living through the greatest crisis in the history of man….far from being irrelevant, prayer, meditation, and contemplation are of the utmost importance in America today.”

Maximilian Maria Kolbe volunteered to die in place of another man at Auschwitz during World War II. “The most deadly poison of our times is indifference.”

Dietrich Bonhoeffer was hanged for his resistance to Hitler. Silence in the face of evil is itself evil: God will not hold us guiltless. Not to speak is to speak. Not to act is to act.”

Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated during the civil rights movement “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was assassinated as he led the nonviolent resistance against British rule in India. “The day the power of love overrules the love of power, the world will know peace.”

Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela spent twenty-seven years in prison because of his anti-apartheid activism. “To deny people their human rights is to challenge their very humanity.”

And let’s not forget these powerful words of Genesis 50:20, “God uses the evil perpetrated against us for His good and makes all things new”.

Lastly, I have been following Andrea Chalupa. She is an amazing Ukrainian-American Journalist and Filmmaker. Here is a link to her podcast with lots of action guides: https://www.gaslitnationpod.com/action-guide

Never, Never, Never Give Up!

As soon as I opened my eyes this morning I started ruminating on the negativity of our new reality since the elections. Then, I looked at my phone and realized that I missed my grandson’s concert at his school yesterday. I was devastated and felt terrible.

Am I trading enjoyment and purpose for loss and fear even when I try to convince myself that God is still present and still has a plan for me, for all of us? I’ve been so stressed about what is likely coming that it has consumed me with angst and dread, in particular for those most vulnerable. But if I continue to dwell on things that I can’t change or control, I will surely miss the beautiful parts of my life right now.

There are certain things that have not, and will not change, no matter what lies ahead: We are all called to care for those God cares most deeply for: The lost, the broken, the suffering. He is surely heartbroken when so many people refuse his call to fulfill their life’s purpose in whatever way he has gifted them. And I am also saying “no” when I want to check out of life.

Debie Thomas speaks of our interconnectedness, “We cause pain and loss when we hold ourselves apart, ….it’s especially challenging to do so now. We live in bitterly divided times. We have good reasons to be cautious and self-protective….Whether we like it or not, our lives are bound up in God’s and in each other’s. The only true life we will live in this world is the life we consent to live in relationship, messy and entangled though it might be.”   

What brought it all home for me were two readings from yesterday. First came the reading of the Prodigal Son’s brother, “then he became angry and refused to go in.” The author of this meditation asks, ”Are you angry and refusing to participate in some space in your life? Is an invitation waiting for you, too, if you can set aside your resentment and anger?”

Oops…Gulp

Next came the Benedictine mediation for that day in which I previously highlighted these words:

“Benedictine spirituality is about coming to a sense of the fullness of life. (It) never gives up on life. Why? Because every day we have gives us another chance to become the real persons we were meant to be. The point, perhaps, is to never give up on life and never doubt that every bit of kindness, every tender touch we lay upon another in life can heal what might otherwise have died, certainly in them, perhaps even in ourselves.”

So, God has spoken to me profoundly in these last few days. He couldn’t be clearer if he tried, even for a hard-head like me!

God needs us now, more than ever, to stay strong in faith, to be that beacon on the hill that he calls us to be in Matthew 5:14, 16, “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”

A Call to Grandparents: Now is Our Time!

When my husband and I married fifty years ago, I went into that relationship as a card-carrying heathen with an attitude, short skirts, and a Dolly Parton wig! No, I’m not kidding!

When I first met his mother, I prepared myself for the anticipated rejection I was used to. To my surprise, that isn’t what happened. She accepted me with all my obvious failings and I didn’t know how to deal with that.

Her faith, kindness, and care for others helped me see what was missing in my life.  She blessed me more than she ever knew.

When I reflect on that experience and compare it to the young people today, I recognize some profound realities:

First, this from the CDC: From 2013 to 2023, there were increases in students’ experiences of violence, signs of poor mental health, and suicidal thoughts and behaviors.

Secondly, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the above statistics coincide with the fact that young people have been fleeing churches in huge numbers for years, feeling they have nothing to offer but “religion” without substance.

Theologian Jennifer Bailey tells us, Indeed, millennials and Generation Z successors to the throne of youth are turning away from institutional religion faster than any other age group, raising a palpable sense of panic in religious communities concerned about their future.”  

But God’s love can reach into that emptiness with a new and vibrant excitement for hope and promise.

I remember that moment so many years ago as I questioned what had drawn me to my mother-in-law. When I finally recognized it, there was no turning back. Yes, I will admit, it was a path to God that was full of fits and starts. It often still is, and I’ve walked along the edges much of the time.

This was also a powerful message for me in my chaplaincy at the Juvenile Detention Center. Recently, the kids witnessed the incredible story of Darren Seals. He lived the life many of the kids there are also living. He challenged them to think about their actions and showed them such love as he spoke!

He is a man who should never have survived his gang experiences and being shot 13 times. As he was speaking, his mother lay dying in the hospital. Tears welled up as he recounted the grief he caused her over the years. Yet when he left her side to go to speak to the kids, she told him to continue his work and how proud she was of him!

So, I would like to focus on Darren’s mother now. As the grandmother of 14 and great-grandmother of 18, I can’t imagine the heartache and fear she felt all those years as he lost his way. But I can imagine her joy in seeing him use his gifts and life experiences to give kids hope in what they often feel is a life wrought with hopelessness.

We, the privileged, have no idea how much so many of our youth are suffering. Do we even care? And, how many of us “elder” folks have also been made to feel they have no further purpose in life? We should just rock away whatever time we have left. No one really wants to listen to advice from old people. Right? Wrong!

Choctaw elder and retired Episcopal bishop Steven Charleston explains how Indigenous elders carry the wisdom of the past in service of the present and future:  

Elders are a people of the future. My culture respects the elders not only because of their wisdom, but because of their determination. The elders are tough. They have survived many struggles and many losses. Now, as they look ahead to another generation, they are determined that their sacrifices will not have been in vain, that their children’s children will not grow up in a world more broken than the one they sought to repair. The elders are voices of justice. They are champions for the earth. They defend the conscience of the community. We follow the elders because they have a passion for tomorrow. They are people of the future, not the past.”  

Theologian Jennifer Bailey: 

All around us, things are shifting, systems are collapsing, and institutions are failing. This should not surprise us. It is clear to me that the actions we take now will have deep and irreversible consequences for the generations to come….  

The enormity of the plight we face can be solved only by harnessing the ingenuity and creativity of the communities to which we belong and are accountable. This season will require us to recover ancestral wisdom and practices that we lost or undervalued, repair the deep breaches in our interpersonal and communal relationships that replicate patterns of harm and destruction, and reimagine the possible by stretching ourselves to see beyond the realities of our current circumstances and daring to dream something different into being.”  

Alrighty then. I believe God has given us a purpose and calling to get off our rockers! There’s work to do. I’m not sure what that means for you, but God knows. As he watches his beloved children suffer and die, he longs for us to take his love to them. We all have a stake in this.

There are so many opportunities to serve. For example, several people go to our Detention Centers to shoot hoops with the boys, do crafts, tutor, and attend the Sunday services.

If your heart is open, God will guide you. 

When Jesus Comes Begging

Recently, I was with a friend when we saw a man begging on the street corner. She made the comment that she doesn’t give money to beggars because she doesn’t know what they’ll do with it. “They’ll probably buy drugs or alcohol.”

I can’t tell you how many people have said that to me over the years. And I can’t tell you how hard it has been for me to keep from slapping them silly! So, hopefully, this post will speak to that in a kinder way that won’t raise my blood pressure or leave marks on them!

Let me set this scene for you. God is in the beginning stages of creating humans. I could have told him that was a bad idea, but he didn’t ask. Anyway, as he draws up his plans and orders his priorities – the top of the list is teaching them to “love”. It’s the most important thing of all to him and what he will base everything else on.

He wants his love for us to naturally flow to our love for others, especially “the least of these”. It’s a great plan, and he’s pretty proud of himself. But for whatever reason, that idea never seemed to gain much popularity over these bazillion years. To this day, considering the latest number of homeless families in America is over 57,000, little seems to have changed.

Over time, God, though a bit peeved, continues to try to show us how to love others by Jesus’ example. And we continually screw up, ask for forgiveness, he obliges, wipes the slate clean, and off we go all bright and shiny until we screw up again…

AND AGAIN.

AND AGAIN.

What if God decided to cancel all future blessings?! He’s thought long and hard about it, and considering our indifference to his call for us to love others as he loves us, he thinks it’s a total wasted effort, especially since he “doesn’t know what we’ll do with them”. Maybe we’ll trade them with someone else for something we would rather have. Like, oh, I don’t know, drugs or alcohol!”

Oops, sorry, I got a little side-tracked there.

We go up – Jesus goes down

While we ascend to the loftiest place on our “spiritual” journey, Jesus descends to the lowest. Of course, we fail to recognize him as we pass him by.

Paradoxically, we worship a homeless man on Sunday and fail to care for the homeless man right in front of us the rest of the week.

Saint Mother Teresa left her safe, comfortable religious order at the age of sixty-eight to sit on the filthy streets of Calcutta, caring for the dirty and rejected homeless. Stroking the heads of those left to die by an indifferent world. An indifferent world we are part of if we fail to care.

Letting go

Are we clinging to our measly pocket change for fear of what the beggar on the corner is going to do with it? Seriously??? That guy is standing there naked and vulnerable, knowing we are judging him. He no more wants to be on that street corner than we do. Geeezzzzzz!

Micah 6:8 challenges us to “Act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.”

My Journey to Finding True Purpose and Self-Acceptance

Oh, the games we play. I know them well. I’ve been playing them all my life. The games that hide our suffering, that mask our own sinfulness, and help us survive.

Growing up, I was always made to believe I was not worthy of love or care. So, I tried desperately to find my worth in things and accomplishments.

I have been artificially propped up by an ego that is always on the alert for another opportunity to impress others, starting years ago as a youth minister and then at Youth-in-Need, hospice, and working with the homeless.

Being pumped up by the admiring comments of others filled a void, “Oh, I admire you for what you do. It takes a special person to do that.” I pretended to brush off the comment while secretly hoping this would be the year I would receive the Time Magazine Person of the Year award. I kinda gave up on that one. I know…shocking!

Are you impressed yet? Do you know who isn’t impressed? Who’s saddened by this litany of “accomplishments” by yours truly? GOD!

1 Cor. 7 speaks directly to the ego, What are you so puffed up about? What do you have that God hasn’t given you? And if all you have is from God, why act as though you are so great and as though you have accomplished something on your own?” Ouch!

In hindsight, I know God was present in all of this. He watched and waited for my AHA moments; for those moments, I could clearly see my shallow attempts to feed the hunger and loneliness of others – all while denying my own.

And those AHA moments were truly profound! Moments when my initial shallowness transformed into compassion and empathy for those I was serving. That’s how God works. He was converting my heart right in the midst of my brokenness.

So, there’s my story—the good, bad, and ugly. And this is my hope – that I am finally recognizing the person I was created to be and the purpose I am to fulfill for whatever time I have left here: to truly point others to God and not myself.

I’m not sure what tomorrow’s going to look like – but I am sure I’m in good hands! I will leave you with this beautiful song by Casting Crowns: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eQd3K2Fxp4

“Bad” Kids and “Hopeless” Saints

I recently completed chaplaincy training for my church, making me a “certified” Lay Chaplain – yeah, me! My long-held desire to work with kids in Juvenile Detention will soon be realized.

During this celebratory moment, I had an encounter with someone that I did not see coming. When I excitedly told him about my graduation and plans to work with the kids, he said, “Oh, the bad kids”. Alrighty then – a remark from a “Christian” kid who wants for nothing.

That was the conversation that prompted this post. My immediate response to him was that there are no “bad” kids, just kids who have made bad choices, often in the midst of circumstances likely out of their control. I know those kids well, having been one myself. No, I was never in jail, but there were times I came close.

Over many years, I have worked with kids in varied ministries and jobs and have shared those stories in past posts. I’ll tell you about two that profoundly impacted my life:

It all started about forty years ago when I decided it would be fun to put together a youth group at our church. I wasn’t really “qualified” to lead a youth program, so I embarked on a three-year Youth Ministry Studies Program.

I came out on the other side, brought together some amazing young adults to help lead it, and it took off. It didn’t seem too intimidating. You know, “good” kids just having fun together and learning a bit about God at the same time.

I recall one incident during that time that deeply impacted me! Two brothers came. One of them, I’ll call him John, always seemed to be bored to death. I often witnessed his brother’s cruel remarks toward him in front of everyone, but this kid kept coming every week.

One time, we put our chairs in a circle for a discussion. John pulled his chair up outside the circle, slumped back, and folded his arms, signaling total indifference. Subtle but noticeable. So, I asked a question. A few of the kids responded, and then John responded. I said to him, “That’s a great answer, John. I would not have thought of that!” Then, he looked at his brother, smiled smugly, and pulled his chair into the circle. Subtle again, right? Until you know his story. Then you realize how profound that gesture was.

John’s family was a mess. His brother excelled in everything he did, and their parents often reminded him of his failings and how he should be more like his brother. His brother also jumped on that ridicule train and criticized him every chance he got. So, his seemingly understated act of pulling his chair into the circle was huge!

A few years later, I went to work for Youth-In-Need and met a kid who challenged my authority – which I wore as a badge of honor. – “Don’t mess with me, I’m in control here, kid!”  I’ll call him Justin. God called him my teacher.

I don’t think Justin ever knew his real identity as a “beloved child of God”. It’s likely that no one ever told him that in his short twelve years of life. I lived that story for years myself, and I sometimes still fall back into a false belief that I’m not worthy.

Anyway, here he was at Youth-In-Need, where I worked as a glorified house-mom. Troubled kids came there just before they ended up in Juvenile Detention if our therapists couldn’t help them get their lives together.

Justin was always angry and pounding his fist on anything that didn’t pound back. On his worst night, we felt we had to contact the on-call therapist. I went downstairs to the office, called her, and explained the situation. She asked if I felt threatened. If I said “yes,” they would have sent the police to take him away.

At that moment, God reached into my exhausted and hardened heart and broke through my stubborn will to control. I told her “no,” I did not feel threatened and that it would be fine.

As soon as I hung up, Justin, who was listening at the door, burst into the office, still angry, “You gonna call the police?! Go ahead, I don’t care! I’m not afraid of you!” I told him that I was not going to call the police and to just go upstairs, get his shower, and go to bed.

Out of somewhere came the words, “And, Justin, if you want a hug, I’ve got one for you.” To which he quickly replied, “Yeah, right!” and slammed the door when he left. While filling out the incident report, I thought, “Yeah, right. What was I thinking?”

When I walked upstairs, he came out of the bathroom, clearly not angry anymore. He looked at me and asked, “Can I have that hug now?” I hugged that kid so hard, wondering if he had ever been hugged. Had anyone ever made him feel worthy of love?

Here is a beautiful quote from Father Gregory Boyle. Working with gang members in L.A. he founded and directs Homeboy Industries. “You stand with the least likely to succeed until success is succeeded by something more valuable: kinship. You stand with the belligerent, the surly, and the badly behaved until bad behavior is recognized for the language it is: the vocabulary of the deeply wounded and of those whose burdens are more than they can bear.”

Do you know how many Saints could also have been defined as “bad” kids? A lot! Here are just two that come to mind for me:

St. Moses the Black

Saint Moses was an enslaved Ethiopian in Egypt in the fourth century. He murdered someone, got kicked out of his master’s house, and became the leader of a band of murderers and robbers. After an AHA moment, determined to change his ways and repent of his sins, he attempted to enter a monastery and become a monk but wasn’t well received because the monks didn’t trust his sincerity. It took a long time to convince them that he had changed. They eventually accepted him, and he also was instrumental in the conversion of some in his former band of robbers.

St. Augustine

 He was also a piece of work. Augustine described himself as a “very bad little boy.” He admitted to being full of anger, a liar, a thief, and a cheat!

 We hear about his mother’s fervent praying for his lost soul, but they also had a terrible relationship. He was mean to her, and there was a two-year period when they didn’t speak to each other.

Augustine continued to struggle with his sins and passions even after his conversion.

So, there you go. We should never assume that any kid is innately “bad”, no matter their actions. Kathy Escobar reminds us to “look the outcast in the eye and remind them of their worth” because it is likely that no one has ever done that.” 

I plan to take all of the God moments and lessons I’ve learned into the Detention Center every time I have the opportunity to love on the kids! Deep down, I want them to know that God will not punish them until they cry “uncle”. He won’t try to scare them into submission like so many of their parents or guardians likely did.

I want to say to all of them, “God wants to love you so fiercely that you will cry – with the joy of knowing you are his beloved, and there’s nothing you can do about it!” I want to help them sort through the kurfuffle they have likely dealt with all their lives. And, yes, I will use the word “kurfuffle” because they’ll love it! I’m going to laugh and cry with them. Then I’ll go home, thank God for another opportunity to love as Jesus loves, take a nap, and do it all over again and again – for as long as I can!

Who knows? Maybe I’ll be known as the kurfuffle-busting granny. They may invite me to their graduations, weddings, and baby baptisms!

And, finally – hopefully – when God’s plan for me has been fulfilled, and I stand before him, I will hear those magical words, “Well, Linda, what a ride, huh?! I will say you got on my last nerve at times, but kudos and well done my good and faithful servant! Oh yeah, and bonus, you can stop counting calories now!”

Don’t Like Your Story? – Change it!

In the immortal words of Mike Tyson, “Everyone has a plan till you get punched in the face”. That, I believe, is the moment you realize those plans are not serving you well, that your life is out of control, and no one is coming to rescue you.  

Sooooo….

  • You have to take control of your own life if you want to start waking up to your purpose.
  • You will never have a good relationship with anyone until you change your relationship with yourself. That requires honesty and self-love.

We are so skilled at blaming others for our unhappiness: an abusive parent, that mean third-grade teacher, God, whoever.

Looking in the mirror is not an option because that would be way too scary. Instead, we allow our ego to run roughshod over us and keep us under its control. But looking in the mirror is the starting point to change.

It’s like standing on burning coals, crying out to God to take away the pain, and then being angry with him for not doing it. Just move your damn feet!

Vance Morgan speaks to our flaws and faults we try to hide, “ … What if there are some parts of my “self” that I hide because I don’t like them because they might reveal character flaws and weaknesses that I would prefer no one know about?”  Never mind that everyone does know about them. They’re pretty obvious by the way we interact with others.

And besides, we all have flaws and faults. We can sit in judgment of everyone who makes messes in our lives. But at the end of the day, we must turn that anger toward our own sinfulness.

Years ago, I read a book by Cherie Carter-Scott titled, “IF LIFE is a GAME, THESE are the RULES”. She explains that our life’s lessons are repeated as often as it takes to learn them. Then, we can move on to new lessons.

Those people in your life who seem to hurt your feelings repeatedly? Lessons.

Those people who get on your last nerve? Lessons.

If we are willing to reflect on the triggers they cause, we will see what the universe constantly tries to show us.

Believe me, after all the years that I whined and cried about the unfairness of my life, of the constant dumping of other people’s crap into my lap, I could finally see I was reacting to the actions of others that reside within myself. It wasn’t pretty.

When it finally became too much to bear, and I fell into the grace of God with all the humility I could muster (which wasn’t much), something unexpectedly changed my focus and, in turn, my life. It began with my working with teenagers who, truth be told, I didn’t even like very much at the time.

I started a youth group at my church, thinking I would be doing them a favor. Aren’t I awesome, and don’t you love me to pieces because I’m doing this for you? It took God a while to get through my hard head as to why I was doing it. I needed my hurting ego fed. But the kids were very accommodating, and my ego was getting all the attention it longed for – until it wasn’t. It was pretty pathetic.

When you invest so much time and energy in something so shallow it inevitably collapses in on itself. Which is what happened to me. Then, there was a sudden breakthrough concerning the immense difference between taking and giving. Constantly taking is draining, while giving without expectations is fulfilling beyond imagining.

I believe it was then that I grew to love those, sometimes obnoxious, teens for no reason except that God loved them. That moment changed the trajectory of my life and showed me that I indeed had a purpose, that I was not the center of the universe, and the only person making me miserable was – well – me.

Though my purpose has changed and evolved over the years, the fullness of heart I feel comes only from God and from listening to him. Even when I wonder if he has lost his mind!

My life, thus far, has been an amazing and often surprising adventure. It has not been without its share of heartaches and disappointments. But through it all, God has never left me, or misguided or disappointed me.

So, if you are in a place in your life where you feel stuck in your messiness and trapped in your hurt and anger towards others you think have ruined your life – I implore you to stop. God has a plan for you. I know that for a fact. He’s waiting for you to let go of that over-burdening ego and allow him to guide your life. You will not regret it.

Those God wants to send you to serve are waiting and hoping for exactly what your gifts can bring into their lives. And isn’t that better than being continually “punched in the face”?!

A Continual Holy Calling

Go ahead – try to hide from God

(Shaquille O’Neal – like you can’t tell!)

Last Sunday was the Feast of the Ascension, celebrated by many Christian faiths.  

Let’s begin with a refresher of the lead-up to this pivotal moment, just in case you slept through it or you didn’t think it applied to you.

 The big question is, why did God send Jesus here?

It wasn’t to flex his muscles – although he could have. He could have taken his anger out on our sinfulness and rejection and wiped us all out. He did it before you know…No, it was to show us in the most powerful way he could how deep his love is for us, particularly those who suffer.

It wasn’t to gather groupies who would idolize him, serve him, and cater to his every whim – although that would have been easier. All he had to do was eliminate free will. But our free will to love him – or not – was too important to him even though the will of those in power nailed his Son to the cross. No, it was to model meekness, humility, and service to those most in need. 

It wasn’t to puff out his chest and boast of his great might – although he had plenty to boast about. No, his extravagant love was manifested through his beloved Son, not puffed up and boastful, but rejected and slumped over on a cross.

And so, Jesus comes without any fanfare

Jesus came to earth as a human being, just like you and me (we seem to have a hard time believing that). He had a particular purpose to fulfill, just like you and me (we can’t seem to believe that either).

God wanted him to show us up close and personal how deeply and passionately we are loved, how much he longs to bless us, and how we should care for and be blessings to others (those truths also seem to have been lost to us on our often broken journey).

Jesus set out to fulfill his purpose even though he knew he was making a lot of “important” people angry, so angry they would kill him. I’m pretty sure no one wants to kill us for striving to be all God created us to be (though that’s not true for many Christians even today.

Just to be sure though, we have to come up with some excuse to opt out – and we do: I’m not smart enough, I’m busy, I don’t think that applies to me. I need to straighten up my messy life and my underwear drawer first (BTW, you can quit using that one. Everyone knows your mother still does that for you).

Daily, Jesus had to decide if he would keep doing what he came to do. Just before they came to take him away, Scripture tells us that he was in agony, praying that God would make it disappear (Luke 22:39-46). After all, the human side of him did not want to suffer. But, in the end, he accepted whatever God’s will was.

In Holy Week – we are reminded of Jesus’ suffering, death, and glorious resurrection on Easter Sunday, which we celebrate as the church’s most powerful reminder of how much God loves us! Easter Sunday is the moment in time when the disciples came out of hiding, when their fears and doubts fell away.

And now we come to the Ascension (Acts 1:5-11). This is when the disciples and Jesus get together for the last time, and they ask him if this would be his grand finale – restoring God’s kingdom. They were beside themselves with excitement and anticipation.

And his response? “Yeah, that’s not your business. That is the business of God. But, not to worry; he will fill you with the Holy Spirit to help you carry on in my name. The work you will do will be epic!”

Then, poof, he was gone. The disciples just stood there scratching their heads and staring up into the emptiness. Then, two guys in white robes showed up, “Hey, what are you doing? Why are you just standing there? It’s time to pull up your big boy pants and get going. It’s called adulting, guys. Jesus worked with you for three years to bring you to this moment of becoming response-able for your part in God’s kingdom work.”

So, what now?

God tells us he made us in his image and had special plans for us before we were even born. He gave everyone gifts and talents and, at the same time, made each person unique and special. (Jeremiah 29:11)

(Charles Schultz quote)

Sure, you may doubt yourself. You may not want to risk using gifts you feel inadequate to pursue. But, if you trust that God gave you those gifts, then you must believe that he has already given you everything you need to use them for his glory. Not doing that would be sort of like gifting you with a new car and not giving you the keys.

What do you say?

If you haven’t already, there is no better time than now to reflect prayerfully on your life’s purpose. Sit quietly with God and ask him to help you consider the following:

  • Do you enjoy helping others?
  • Do you consider yourself a leader?
  • What makes you happy – sad?
  • What are you passionate about?
  • Has someone else told you that you are good at something?
  • Who do you admire and why? (Often, what we admire in others is what we would like to develop in ourselves).

God is waiting for each of us to come out of hiding, step out of our comfort zone, and serve this broken world.

It’s time to deeply contemplate Jesus’ life, death, resurrection – and his calling to each of us. Is this your resurrection moment? Is it time for your “yes”?  

2 Corinthians 5:17 proclaims that you are a new creation in Christ each new day, “This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”

Also, and very importantly, when considering your gifts and how you are called to use them try not to get all full of yourself in the process – okay? It would be easy to do, but, dear heart, this isn’t about you! Sorry.

Now, go on. What are you waiting for? Have no doubt that God knows you’re a hot mess – so what?

Ignoring God’s Call – Bad Idea!

(iStock photo)

First, I will treat you to the condensed version of: “What the #%*& am I waiting for?”

  • About twenty-three years ago, in a clear audible voice, God told me to write a book. So I did. Then, I paid $10,000 (yep, that’s the correct number of zeros) to have it edited and self-published. Two thousand copies were dropped off on my front porch a few months later. Then, I stared at them, realizing I knew nothing about marketing. And apparently, I knew nothing about trusting a “Christian publisher” who knew nothing about editing. So they languished in my basement until I had them burned. Literally. I rewrote the book and had five hundred printed. Most of those are still in boxes.
  • I continually claim I want to be healthy, yet I have started, changed, and failed on more diets than I want to admit. Oh yeah – and – mint chocolate ice cream!
  • I am determined to start running again. I dust off my running shoes and trip over boxes of books, trying to get out the door. Then, have to rest with an ice pack on my ankle.
  • I have been writing a blog for 20 years and give up whenever I consider submitting articles for publication. When writing, I sometimes crack myself up with my weird sense of humor and occasionally impress myself when writing about some awesome AHA moment. But I’m likely just living in the light of my own ego.

So, that’s the condensed story of me getting and staying stuck for most of my adult life. Unfortunately, I can’t give you an accurate number of years. But I can say with confidence that I have never been good at “adulting” well!

Now, here I am, looking down the barrel of old age and the reality that I am not a modern-day female Methuselah who has lots of time to get my act together.

James Finley says of Step Two of AA, “The admitting then brings us to a place in which, if this is up to me, it is not looking good. As long as we were still holding on to this ideology of our brokenness as having the final say in who we are, we were not capable of seeing this because we actually had faith in our own brokenness as the power to name who we are.” That pretty much describes me!

Another enlightening moment materialized for me after reading Dr. Joe Dispenza’s work, which I wrote about in my last post. He tells us to “Stop telling the story of your past and start telling the story of your future.”

Apparently, all of our “stuckness” is of our own making because we have allowed others to define us. That gets embedded into our beliefs about ourselves and directs our thoughts and actions. Fun stuff!

F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “For what it’s worth… it’s never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit. Start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you’ve never felt before. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start over again.”

And so, here I sit after fracturing a pelvic bone and being told by the doctor to SIT for 4-6 weeks! I don’t listen well and certainly don’t “SIT” well! But this incident certainly got my attention. Actually, I believe it was God that got my attention:

GOD: So, Linda, there you sit on your broken parts, checking off the days until you are mobile again. While you’re sitting there, have you come up with a new excuse for not using those gifts I gave you? You do know I never created a female version of Methuselah, right?

I’m losing my patience with you, Linda Russell. You don’t want me to lose my patience (read: Job and Jonah).

ME: Oops.

Alrighty then. Here I go. Today, I will spend my sitting time finding a Christian Publishing Company that accepts articles. Submit one. Say a prayer. Send. Then, celebrate with a well-deserved nap!

Acting ‘As If’: A Path to Healing and Growth

(Original post-2021)

Well, I’m still here in case you were wondering – or even if you couldn’t care less (in which case, I don’t suppose you’d be reading this). Regardless, here we go…

For over a year, I went kicking and screaming into a sudden and uncertain reality. In the process, I have slowly, often unwillingly, been discovering who I am in the midst of loss, pain, and sorrow. The world I thought would never change – changed – without any warning. NOT FAIR!

I reasoned (something my A.D.D. brain should know by now to question) that it was time for a change. So, I packed up my former self, one box, one picture, one memory at a time. I suddenly realized I had been trying to suppress the uncertainty of my future with superficial words and inadequate certitudes, “I’m fine. Really!” – even though it may appear that I’m losing my shit!

Some “experts” encourage us to act “as if” _________(fill in the blank) until it becomes our truth. So, I did – or at least I tried. But, in pretending I was already there, I believe I also denied the necessary process of change. So, does acting “as if” my life is often a total shitstorm count? Because right now it is – no acting required.

Jen Hatmaker beautifully describes the inevitable change of seasons in life, “It can be difficult to envision a new start but impossible to deny one. This is your work. No one can do it for you. Something doesn’t have to be bad to be over. That season has possibly given you everything it had to offer; it shaped and developed you, and it stretched and inspired you. We are not entirely rebranded with each new season; we simply build the next layer. As a testament to our design, we are capable of preserving the best of each season while rejecting the worst. The human heart is shockingly resilient. We need to get better at permission and grace.”

The pictures are packed up now, leaving bare walls and lots of nail holes my husband never knew about because, well, why measure when you can just eyeball distance, even if you suck at it! I didn’t take the time to count, but I’m pretty sure there were at least five or six holes behind each picture!

But I digress…

It has become clear to me that I have been stuck in the past. God tells us to stay out of there and move on, trusting Him every step of the way. The past certainly formed my identity to this point, and I am grateful for all of its lessons. But that’s not the end of my story or my journey. Hatmaker says, “You can care about new things and new beginnings and new people. Carry on, sister!” Carry on, indeed!

(Tenor GIF)

God wants me, wants all of us, to boldly step into each new day, believing every life experience, good or bad, will influence how we impact our world. Our loving God has created our most outlandishly gifted, magnificently designed selves for that very purpose.

It’s time to grab onto the desire of my heart that has been sitting too long and aching to be acknowledged, that one passion refusing to fade away no matter how much I have tried to ignore it.

Boring Sermon Causes Boy to Jump to His Death

Ladies, this one’s for you! Guys, you’re welcome to listen in if you can refrain from making faces or snarky comments. So, let’s continue:

He didn’t really jump. He fell. But he was still dead. But not for long because Paul revived him. Just to drag his aching body back upstairs to listen for hours more! Do you think I’m kidding? Here’s what happened: Acts: 20:7-12, We met on Sunday to worship and celebrate the Master’s Supper. Paul addressed the congregation. We planned to leave first thing in the morning, but Paul talked on and on the way past midnight….A young man named Eutychus was sitting in an open window. As Paul went on and on, Eutychus fell sound asleep and toppled out the third-story window. When they picked him up, he was dead. Paul went down, fell on him (Resuscitation methods certainly have evolved, haven’t they?), and hugged him hard. “No more crying,” he said. “There’s life in him yet.” Then Paul… went on telling stories of the faith until dawn!”

Take a hint, Paul!

So, some preaches should not be preaching

Paul certainly had his gifts, but droning on and on may not have been his crowning achievement.

Some teachers should not be teaching

Matthew 23:13 (NIV), “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the door of the kingdom of heaven in people’s faces. You yourselves do not enter, nor will you let those enter who are trying to.”

Some prophets maybe should not have been prophesying, at least not naked

Isaiah 20:3, “And the LORD said, Like as my servant Isaiah hath walked naked and barefoot three years for a sign and wonder upon Egypt and upon Ethiopia….”

On the other hand, some who have been gifted fail to say “yes” to their calling.

Ladies, I am talking to you in particular!

And there is no better time than now as we approach Jesus’ final hours to discuss this topic.

You know how this goes. Jesus had been walking with and teaching his disciples for three years. But, unfortunately, they were a motley crew of doubters, nay-sayers, and power grabbers, often blind fools who could not see beyond their cultural biases.

And the women? They understood very well their customs and traditions. They were inferior to men, under the rule of their fathers or husbands, and had no authority in any area of their lives. Women were not allowed in the Temple to worship, and talking to strangers was forbidden. The slightest infraction of these laws often resulted in their being stoned to death.

Then along came Jesus. Glory be! He loved them, talked to them, and raised them to a new status. Though it may be difficult to believe because they are rarely named, Jesus had many female disciples. Who stuck around when Jesus was led to his trial? The men? NO! They ran scared. It was the women who stayed with him from the moment he touched their lives until his resurrection.

The men ran off in fear because this was not what they had envisioned. They were sure Jesus came as an earthly king, and they would share in his power. When it was clear things were going badly, they hid behind locked doors to save their own sorry butts.

Not so the women. Ah, you gotta love those women! Jesus had so empowered them that there was nothing that would keep them away from his side. It’s as if they were saying to all those who participated in Jesus’ crucifixion, “Go ahead, make my day! Crucify me too! I’m not afraid of you anymore!”

Who did Jesus first appear to after his resurrection? The disciples? No! Okay, probably not We don’t know for sure. Most scripture scholars believe it was Mary Magdalene and “the other Mary.” Some scholars say he did not appear to Mary first but to Cleopas or the disciples, but it is important to remember that some scripture writers were concerned about cultural norms that could have influenced their writing. So, I’m sticking with Mary on this one.

What is important is what we take away from Jesus’ love for and treatment of women, the worth and value he placed on them. Remember, for men in those days, it was all about power. Serving others was foreign to them; it was not their responsibility, not so with women. Women are innately gifted for service, nurturing, compassion, and putting others first. That was the connection they had with Jesus. A man who valued and related to their giftedness for the first time in their life.

I am reasonably sure you will not feel you have anything to offer until you believe how deeply God loves you and how he longs to forgive the sins you cling to as proof that you are not worthy of that love. That was the reality for me. Life had convinced me that I was a terrible mistake. I deduced that he wasn’t there when I was being abused because he didn’t care, and he undoubtedly hated me for my own sinfulness.

But then something happened that changed my life. It was a pivotal moment that I talked about in my book. That moment when God said, “Linda, I was there when you were being abused, suffering right along with you, and I was there every time you sinned. But your life will be restored if you turn to me and seek my forgiveness and mercy. Your true self – the person I created out of love – will emerge and thrive! Just trust me.

God has called each of us to use our gifts for his glory, to make our little corner of the world a better place, and to let his light shine on our suffering brothers and sisters. I don’t know what gifts God has given you. But if they are teaching, preaching, or prophesying, just don’t be boring, and don’t do it naked…PLEASE!