For so long, I could not see that my stubborn resistance to God was the cause of my pain and emptiness. I could not hear His voice over the thunder of abuse and sinfulness.
The irony of believing I was controlling my life was that it was totally out of control! When I became tired of the lies and weary from the pain, I found myself at the foot of the cross. There I learned the meaning of surrender based on love, and the gentle hand of God began healing my brokenness.
I realized surrender didn’t mean giving in to the bullies in my life. It didn’t give someone else the upper hand or add to the shame I already labored under. What I found instead was: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). I hope you enjoy this journey with me, and I invite any thoughts you may like to share.
Also, the dates of the posts might just cause some serious head-scratching. I can explain. I recently changed Host Servers, and since I am pathetically and irreparably challenged technically, all my posts were lost – gone – obliterated. That meant that I had to reconstruct them, but I could not backdate them. I also didn’t want to lose them, as writing for me can be painfully tedious. I only have so much wit and wisdom to go around. So, to save my sanity, I just posted them and left it at that. Okay? Good.
“May the Lord bless and keep you. May His face shine on you, and bring you so much peace, you’ll be compelled to share those blessings with everyone you encounter!” Numbers 6:24-26 (Ok, I embellished a bit)