Don’t Allow Fear to Destroy Your Peace

October 31, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Boldness in adversity, Consider trials pure joy!, fear, God's plan, Humility, life's trials, peace, Trusting God, Whining to God

“Peace is that brief, glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.” (source unknown.)

Here she comes – Miss America! There she goes to save the Coastal California Gnatcatcher, repair a broken nail, and, of course, bring peace to the world. And how about those hippies back in the 1960s with their mantra of peace and love (not to mention sex, drugs, and rock & roll)? Maybe we shouldn’t doubt the good intentions of anyone who claims to advocate peace.

Only one Nobel Peace Prize is awarded each year,and, unless I’ve missed something, I don’t believe that world peace, or any lasting peace, has ever come with the prize. Of course, it’s a very big world. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there are seven billion people worldwide, more than two billion of whom are Christians. So how can this be such a violent place when it’s home to two billion Christians? Surely, two billion Christians could’ve changed the world by now! Why aren’t we making a greater impact?

The Heart of the Matter

Where does peace begin? How about violence? Are they hatched at peace rallies, do they spring forth during the heat of battle, or are they created in our hearts? Consider how different this world would be if every one of us lived the virtue of peace within our own hearts! Matthew tells us, “A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things, and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things” (Luke 6:45).
We shake our fists at the injustice and violence that are out there, but deny the violence within. We cannot know peace or offer it to others until we’re able to face our own brokenness – our own need for God’s healing and grace. I was good at shaking my fist at the injustices in the world, all while inflicting my own injustices on others. Why? Because I had no peace in my heart, which was filled instead with anger, fear, and pride.

“Peace I Leave with You, My Peace I Give to You” (John 14:27)

How beautiful Jesus’ words sound, yet we find very little success in our attempts to make peace a reality in our lives. In fact, the struggle seems so daunting that we often settle for a very limited version of peace: an occasional moment of calm in the midst of our troubled lives. That was how I coped for years. Frustration would prompt me to seek God’s intervention, but I wasn’t actually interested in peace with the people in my life. I wanted to be able to inflict “justice” on those I felt were stealing my peace.

Sometimes we think we have peace. “Whew! My husband is going fishing with the guys. I’ll have two whole days of peace.” Or “My kids have stopped fighting. There’s finally peace in the house.” Maybe your controlling mother-in-law mercifully moves out of town, or that tyrannical boss may be transferred to a distant city. But those examples don’t constitute peace. They’re merely the absence of war.

Can you recognize the difference between a peaceful person and someone who’s simply stifling his emotions? That’s the kind of person who attempts to control himself enough to give the appearance of peace, but he’s not fooling anybody. I know. That was me.

I always had public and private personas. In my private life, everything was out of control, though publicly I acted as if the opposite were true. But my kids invariably gave me away – usually in church or in the middle of the grocery store. That was when my amateur ventriloquist skills would kick in. Smiling through clenched teeth and with a death grip on the offender’s arm, I would quietly threaten, “Either you knock it off, or there’ll be hell to pay when I get you home!” Obviously, “peace” was not flowing like a river. This river was a maelstrom of anger, fear, discontent, and pride.

What, then, is the key to peace? It’s humility, and I can’t wait to tell you why. This is where I get to expose my dark side to you. So let’s begin with the anger.

Anger: A Double-Edged Sword

I’ve lived with anger all my life and, since childhood, have cowered behind it when threatened by bullies. The parent bully, the teacher bully, the neighborhood bully, the checker at the grocery store bully. I’ve always considered myself a victim. But there’s no justification for lashing out with angry words that are embedded in someone’s heart.

When I was a child, my outbursts generally involved slamming doors and mumbling “I hate you!” under my breath. As I withdrew more and more into myself, I began to feel invisible. My longing for recognition became fertile soil for the anger that was festering inside me. Later, when I had outgrown parental control I gave myself the freedom to express anger without fear of punishment. With each outburst, I was essentially screaming, “Pay attention to me!” – and I was oblivious to anyone’s feelings other than my own.

Do I believe that anger is always wrong? No, I think that misplaced anger is. As people who never express their anger fail to understand, inner anger has to go somewhere. It has to be dealt with. A person may look composed, but on the inside, there could be a pressure cooker destined to explode – or to implode, in the form of ulcers, cancer, stroke, or heart attack. There’s no peace in denial, just as there’s no peace in exploding into unjustified and unrighteous anger.

Sometimes God is angry with us, and he doesn’t mince words when that happens. In many verses throughout Scripture, he admonishes his people, calling them liars, adulterers, idolaters, and self-righteous fools. As he said to Judah, “For you have kindled a fire in my anger which shall burn forever” (Jeremiah 17:4).

So what’s the difference between God’s anger and mine? It’s a case of righteous versus unrighteous anger. Unrighteous anger is the outward expression of unmet needs. When fear is the underlying emotion that sets us off, the anger is dangerous and hurtful. In the Bible, the Book of Nahum says, “He avenges his foes. He stands up against his enemies, fierce and raging. But God doesn’t lose his temper. He’s powerful, but it’s a patient power” (Nahum 1:2-3 – The Message). Anger is not permissible when it turns to aggression, and that aggression is fueled by fear, frustration, or a sense of inadequacy.

We need to accept that anger is a learned behavior, not a genetic trait. My mousy brown and grey hair, which I’m forever trying to cover up, is genetic. My behavior, which I’m forever trying to cover up, isn’t. Unrighteous anger is violence against others. It’s the suffering and death of Jesus at the hands of an angry mob. It’s a frightened child cowering in the dark. It strews victims everywhere.

When I realized God’s unconditional love for me, my anger began to subside – yet something continued to rob me of his peace. Fear was so deeply embedded in the very depths of my being that it freely manifested itself in every area of my life. Even though I was no longer railing constantly at every perceived threat, fear was still wreaking havoc in my life, albeit with greater subtlety, and of course, fear is Satan’s most powerful and creative tool.

Since we’re afraid of our own brokenness, we expend tremendous energy denying it, covering it up, or justifying it. Any time we strike out at someone else, or whenever we curse our circumstances, we’re motivated by fear – fear of losing control or of feeling invisible, unwanted, unloved. Can you name your fears? Can you admit that you have any?

Who’s Your Boogie Man?

Growing up, I was afraid of everything, yet somehow I seemed to be scared of nothing. Whenever my dad paddled me, I didn’t cry. When my teachers disciplined me, I feigned indifference. Back then, teachers were allowed to inflict corporal punishment on their students, and they did!

My first-grade teacher used to have me sit under her desk when I misbehaved, which gave me the opportunity to entertain my fan club by sticking my head out of my jail and making faces. My second-grade teacher spanked me, and my third-grade teacher regularly whacked me with a ruler. I was a class clown on the outside and a frightened child on the inside. I thought that drawing attention to myself was crucial to preserving my fragile ego.

The sixth grade presented me with an interesting means of gaining attention without enduring physical pain. By impressing my peers with my vast knowledge about sex, I developed, at the age of twelve or thirteen, my very first feelings of power and acceptance. Never mind the fact that I had no idea what I was talking about. None of us had any knowledge about sex, but we were curious. So I stepped into that gap. I became the facts-of-life expert.

My classmates were responsive and eager to learn from me, so at recess we would gather for my no-holds-barred sex-education class. When I think of all the young minds that I warped back then, I’m pretty much aghast. For instance, I wonder how many girls were too terrified to kiss boys while menstruating because I’d warned them that they’d get pregnant that way. Somewhere out there, someone is cursing the day she met me!

Fear: God’s Nemesis

God continually tells us not to fear anything.

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God” (Isaiah 41:10).

“…then, as the Lord lives, there is safety for you and no harm” (1 Samuel 20:21).

“In God I have put my trust; I will not fear” (Psalm 56:4).

The only way to live a fearless life is by forming a relationship with God. I have never felt protected by anyone in my life. It wasn’t until I learned to trust in God’s protection that the truth about fear was made manifest to me. Satan, in all his trickery and deceit, is rendered powerless by the light of God’s love.

Have you ever stayed up all night, worried and afraid? Remember how you couldn’t eat, couldn’t think? Remember how irritable and short-tempered you were? So tell me something: how much did all that agonizing help? Not much? Well, it’s not what God wants for us, as Matthew reminds us in a very familiar story:

The disciples were in a boat out in the middle of the sea, and the wind and waves were fierce. When they suddenly saw someone walking on the water, they were understandably scared out of their wits. In fact, they thought it must be a ghost, but it was Jesus, who urged them not to be afraid. Impressed, Peter decided that he’d like to do the same thing. So Jesus told him to step out of the boat, which he did, and he was fine as long as he was focused on Jesus. As soon as he looked away, though, he began to sink, crying out, “Lord, save me!” And this was the man whom Jesus would be entrusting with the keys to heaven? At that moment, though, with the ravenous water closing in around him, Peter wasn’t trying to impress anybody. He wasn’t trying to save face. He was trying to save his sorry behind. He knew who to call on when he was in trouble!

Fear has no teeth when we put our trust in God – and I don’t mean when we know the outcome. Yet we function so poorly on trust alone. Instead, we dig in our heels and refuse to budge. If we don’t know for sure what’s happening around the corner, we stay put. Fear denies us the fullness of life that God has promised.

If you’re still satisfied with your entrenched self, consider this scenario. Imagine that, when God called me to graduate school, I blabbed the news to all my friends and family members, then failed miserably and whined about my failure to everybody. Then imagine that God called one of them to do something extraordinary. Would she do it? Of course not. After witnessing my dismal failure, she’d surely decline the invitation. “No thanks. I’m good. I saw how that played out for Linda!”

However, God isn’t going to allow us to make him look bad. We can trust him to fulfill his plans for our lives in ways that we never could’ve imagined. And if Mary and Jesus didn’t need to know the eventual outcomes of their commitments to God, then neither do we.

Contentment Isn’t Out of Reach

Is it really possible to remain content in the midst of difficult circumstances? Or does your life have to be perfect before you can be happy? Do you need to run away from home and responsibilities, live in seclusion on some primitive island, eat coconuts and wild berries, soak up the sun all day, and laze in the tropical breezes at sunset? Wait. This is beginning to sound pretty good! Oops…sorry.

As far back as I can remember, I was never content. I was never satisfied with anything. I never had enough money or nice clothes. I wasn’t smart enough. I wasn’t thin enough. I wasn’t popular enough. My teeth weren’t straight enough. My hair wasn’t blonde enough.

I spent a long time in the desert just like the Isrealites, and I didn’t have any fun there. When I was in the midst of it, though, I couldn’t see it for what it was. I had to have things. I had a beautiful home, new cars, and a swimming pool; shopping was my favorite pastime. Whenever I felt down, I’d treat myself to a new outfit or two, or three. Occasionally, I’d throw in a little trinket for my husband (as a nod to my guilty conscience!), but he was never allowed to buy me clothes. I mean, he once bought himself a polyester leisure suit. Enough said?

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives” (John 14:27)

Our peace is stolen from us every time we lose sight of God, every time we allow others to define us. Only God can define us! “This is my beloved son/daughter in whom I am well pleased” (Matt 3:17). You were made in the image and likeness of God; no one and nothing on earth can rob you of your birthright.

Perfectly Imperfect

August 2, 2025August 2, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Does god control?, embrace change, fear, grace, Healing, life is short, life's trials, perfection

Two things (and a few additions along the way) set me on a journey that I would like to share with you: The book, “One Year to Live” by Stephen Levine, and “A Course in Miracles – Made Easy”, by Allen Cohen.

Spending each moment, each day, as though I only have this one year to live is not a stretch for me. I contemplate my death at times (come on, that’s not so crazy!) trying to realize how precious life is, how fleeting it is, and how much of it I have wasted.

The challenge of “One Year to Live” is to focus on the moment, not the past or the future. To consider what is really important and what is not, to leave a richer legacy for those I leave behind, and to have no regrets. All of which I do fairly well at times and suck at most of the time.

“The Course” promises to take me even deeper. “Mastering the journey from fear to love”. I pray to be ever present to all God has to teach me along the way.

Levine considers this process “a restoration of the heart when we confront our life and death with mercy and awareness. A year-long experiment in healing, joy, and revitalization.”

(ACIM) “Every moment offers us a choice between fear and love. Fear hurts and love heals. There are no other choices. Answer fear with love and you will find the peace you seek.”

Just this short introduction to both these books has made it so clear that I have wasted more time in the past, in the negative, and in fear than I want to admit. God has given me this precious life, meant to be beautiful, abundant, and rich, and I have tasted such a small sample of it. But I’m still here, still breathing and I can begin again, and again.

(SL) “A year to live gives a person the power to heal that which remains unloved.” I have believed the lies that I am unworthy of love since childhood. I am always on guard to protect a fragile ego that I have created myself. The truth that longs to set me free from these lies is the fact that I am a child of a loving God; made in his image. I am not a worthless, invisible mess, and neither is anyone else. I don’t need to defend an image that is not reality and I don’t need to attack others to protect it.

(SL) “There are two main elements that constitute the foundation of this life’s renewal, (1) exploration of what has gone before and a way of clearing a path for what is to come, and (2), to become more present, more mindful of the process we call life.”

(ACIM) “When you challenge God as to how the world will be changed, his answer is: Through you. You bring the presence of God to the world simply by being yourself (your true self, not the self you created). Each time you choose, your choice is your evaluation of yourself.”

Stephen Levine says that this year should empower me to finally heal that part of me that still feels unloved. The part that is often unloving. Living the lies of the past powerfully impacted the present. What are my limiting beliefs that keep me stuck there? If can recognize them I can change them to empowering and positive beliefs.

All of this work to become aware and to let go of the past, is critical to the work God would have me do. Now I realize that my negative beliefs color my life and rob me of the love, joy and peace that are my birthright.

Yes, I make mistakes (DUH!). It is fear that keeps us from living fully and joyfully in the present. Why is it so hard to believe that God wants to use me (ME!) as a witness to his love?

If all of this isn’t challenging enough, I was also introduced to Marianne Williamson’s book, “The Gift of Change” which refers often to “A Course in Miracles”. Her book is so powerful and reaches to the depth of my being.

Then, I had the blessing of meeting for lunch with a dear friend who introduced me to Christine McDonald. Her story of being sex trafficked for almost twenty years, the drugs and homelessness, physical abuse and often torture, the sense of hopelessness and then the powerful way God moved in her life is a story beyond anything we could ever imagine. And her beautiful spirit is something to behold! I have read her book, “The Same Kind of Human” (which was being considered for a movie at the time).

Sometimes I question if I read too many things at one time. But then I think of it as having several friends and each has a unique relationship with me. All the books I am reading are speaking to that same depth of my heart but in different, unique ways. All sharing one important message, “You’ve got work to do, Linda”. So, shake off your doubts, acknowledge your fears and then let them go. I have plans for you and you’re not getting any younger – just sayin’”.

These teachings have been challenging to say the least. For sure, they are helping guide me on this journey of change, renewal, awareness, and conviction. Conviction that now is the time. That whatever God has planned for me, whatever steps I have taken to this point, are all converging for a reason. I truly believe that the next adventure I sign up for, and I don’t even know what it is yet, will be my most significant. Ever!

Here is the common theme I see with these authors: meditation and contemplative practice are to be our most critical focus. Then, we focus on how that will be done. Those two things will demand more time and attention than I have ever given to anything.

To that end, I am compelled now to set all else aside and focus on God and on our relationship. That means more time sitting in his presence. Quietly. That’s huge for me! And listening – I’m so bad at listening!

Until now I could never have imagined such intensity of purpose. Fear has always kept me at a safe distance from it. But God has finally broken through this hard shell around my fragile heart. I thought I had to be perfect for him to love me. But, he has shown me that I have misunderstood what Jesus meant by” perfection” in Matthew 5:48, which has been the cause of my pain and suffering because I felt I never measured up. The wholeness God offers us has nothing to do with perfection.

If we interpret Jesus’ saying, “You must be as perfect as God” through the lense of most religious teachings that has to mean that we can never, ever, ever sin. EVER! – then there’s no hope for any of us.

But many Scripture Scholars don’t believe that was what Jesus meant. Besides, if it was, and we became that perfect human what would we need God for? God knew we would all “sin and fall short”. It’s the nature of humanity. So, let’s insert the word “strive”. Strive for perfection and when you screw up, which you will, seek God’s forgiveness, which he will, and move along.

I will end with something that will hopefully help you, as it has me: GET OVER YOURSELF! You’re welcome.

It’s to Die For: Caring for the Poor in an Age of Consumerism

July 21, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in "Christians" who hate, Do you love Me?, dying for hope, Follow Me, hungry for hope, Love your neighbor, our homeless neighbor, serving others, the suffering need our care, white supremacy and the church

All across the country, people stand in lines three-deep for hours to be the first to plop down a few thousand dollars for the latest iPhone. As usual, the media, the gatekeeper of American values, gleefully stands watch over the frenzy.

Nearby, and unnoticed, other people stand in lines. They are the invisible poor in our midst. Statistics show that on any given day, some portion of the 14.3 million families in this country are standing in food lines (Bread for the World 2022).

And it’s getting worse. Those numbers will increase as programs like the Child Tax Credit, the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP), and the Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) are all being cut by our current administration.

To the “haves”, the expression ‘It’s to die for” refers to our obsession with “things”. To the “have-nots”, that expression resonates from the pit of their empty stomachs. In both cases, consumerism defines who we are.

For those obsessed with self-gratification, and there are many “Christians” in their ranks, what they “have” defines who they are. For the poor, what they don’t have determines their value. The former well fed, the latter hungry, both dying spiritually. But this is nothing new. God has grieved over this fact of our humanity since the beginning of time.

He has been sending us Prophets, starting with Amos and Isaiah, to speak to this travesty. And they did not hold back! They continually called out those who believed all their riches and privilege were due to being favored by God. So, the admonishments and “woe to you” warnings of the prophets were simply laughable and annoying to them. Perhaps that’s why Jeremiah wanted to run and hide when God called him into service! But he finally went when he could no longer bear Yahweh’s grief, and he paid a hefty price for that courage.

Then, along came Jesus. Jeremiah and Jesus shared the same passion for the poor and disgust for their oppressors, and they bore the same hatred from those who didn’t want to be reminded of their sinfulness. God’s message was clear to both of them: Be willing “to die for” those who suffer.

Christ still tells us that when we care for the least of these, we care for him. Why are we still not listening? Could it be that we, too, are so enmeshed in this consumerist mentality and individualism that we simply don’t care? Or could it be that the gospel of American Express is louder and more appealing? “Woe to you, shopper, if you don’t use your REDcard for all your needless purchases.”

Do we feel a little better about it if we know that a tiny percentage of our spending goes to African Relief? That works for the barely guilty and isn’t risky because we don’t actually have to see the poor and suffering. Not so easy when hungry children are right in our midst, as are modern-day prophets.

How are today’s prophets speaking to our obsession with self? They are speaking the truth about the chasm between the rich and the poor. They scream unfair andtell us boldly and without reserve, that if we call ourselves Christians, we are charged to care for the poor.

Mother Teresa says Woe to us if we do not recognize the dignity of the poor, that they too are made in the image of God. “Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.”

Dorothy Day was a tireless advocate for the poor: “The Gospel takes away our right forever, to discriminate between the deserving and the undeserving poor.”

John Kavanaugh, S.J. “It is our consumeristic culture today that defines our values, and forms our meaning and purpose. Companies market hope and identity in commodities, not relationships.”

Walter Burghardt, S.J., said that feeding the hungry is not simply a miracle Jesus performed; it is a mandate for Christians.

Kenneth Himes tells us that the word “consume” means “devour, waste, exhaust“, and calls our obsession with consumption in America pathological. “Consumer behavior has been removed from ethical judgment”, which then allows us to become complacent about God’s call to share our resources and acknowledge our indifference toward our starving neighbor. What has been lost is the essence of who we truly are and why we exist.

Mirabai Starr, “Our encounter with the manifold losses that characterize the human experience can till the soil of our hearts so that we are more available to the suffering of other beings and the earth we share. Sorrow can be paralyzing at first, but compassion, which can sometimes take the form of anger, is a wellspring that offers infinite sustenance.”

As for me, my life changed drastically when I finally looked in the mirror and saw my own sinfulness. Woe to me! My greed and self-fulfillment came on the backs of the poor and hungry. My refusal to give up the slightest want caused children to go to bed hungry. “Thus says the Lord God, enough, Linda! Do what is just and right.” (Ezekiel 45:9)Truth be told, I still suck at it at times. But I’m getting better at self-correcting ahead of that Holy Whack!

In a country in which the majority of people profess to be Christian, our actions do not match that profession of faith. Woe to us, “Hypocrites!” Pope Paul IV spoke of rights as the right not to “have” more, but to “be” more. That is true for all human beings – the needy, and perhaps even more so, the greedy.

Only Man/Woman can Prove that God is Love

May 28, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in A Holy Whack, Boldness in adversity, Do Something, Does god control?, For such a time as this, If not us, then who?, standing on Holy ground, the suffering need our care

We are currently in the midst of incredibly challenging times. This is a truth that some may only whisper, perhaps in the hopes that it will all fade away. However, the reality is that it won’t. So, in the face of this reality, how do we move forward with any hope for our children and grandchildren’s future?

I believe it must begin with God – and acknowledging the fact that many doubt he even cares. It conjures up an image of him sitting in his heaven, feeling rejected by humanity and giving up on the whole lot of us. All while smacking his head and rethinking that “free will” idea of his.

Archibald MacLeish, an American poet and writer, powerfully explains what God may have hoped for by refusing to control us, “Man depends on God for all things: God depends on man for one. Without man’s love, God does not exist as God…and love is the one thing no one, not even God himself, can command. It’s either a free gift, or it’s nothing. And it is most itself, most free, when it is offered in spite of suffering, of injustice, and of death.”

Do MacLeish’s words resonate with you? They certainly do with me. But believe me, I tried to deny that truth for a long time as I continuously prayed for God to “fix” this broken world and the people in my life who made me miserable. It never worked. Even though I believed my suffering was created by other people that I desperately wanted to control. Can you relate?

Well, dear ones, take heart because this broken ground we stand on is holy ground, and we are called to stay put, no matter how hard it seems. We are called to stand on that hilltop and emulate the LOVE that is God. We are to boldly and without apology declare that God has not abandoned us but is in our midst, cheering us on for the sake of his kingdom.

But the love of God will not manifest if we merely sing his praises in church to get that “I showed up every Sunday” card punched. God isn’t interested in our praises. He longs for us to show up in the midst of the brokenness that surrounds us and love those who suffer. If that seems scary, it’s understandable.

Think of the Desert Monks who went off into the wilderness and lived in caves. They prayed A LOT for the brokenness of the world, and I’m sure God loved their prayers. But I prefer to focus on why he sent Jesus into the world. It surely was meant as a wake-up call for us to come out of hiding. Just sayin’.

Yes, Jesus also went into the desert to pray when things were tough, but he didn’t stay there! He offered his prayers to God, accepted his fate, and came out swinging! Remember that whole table-tossing event?

I believe that’s what God is calling us to do now: to do what we can to care for the most innocent, those without a voice, those who suffer. This is no time to fret or worry about the outcome; there’s too much at stake.

It will likely be challenging and perhaps dangerous, but as that ever-pressing question goes, “If not us, then who?”

Like my hero, Esther, who knew she was called to a fate that would likely end her life. And her response? “WOOHOO, I will go, and, oh well, if I die, I die!” Okay, she probably wasn’t that thrilled, but she was determined to fulfill her purpose, and that should be our response to God’s call for us.

Oh, you don’t believe God has spoken to you about that? This may be where self-critical thinking is required. Is it possible you’re not listening? Is it possible you’re spending too much time whining and complaining about how others are making your life miserable, and you’re just sitting and waiting for God to take care of that first? Then you’ll consider moving beyond your own selfish longings in the comfort of your shallow existence? Sorry, I guess that was mean. But is it true?

I know it was true for me for longer than I care to admit. And here’s the sad reality of that: my being so angry and hateful toward those who hurt me over so many years was probably worse in some instances than the injustices of others toward me.

My own actions likely provoked some of that. Like the time I threw a bar stool at a wall to get my husband’s attention! Yeah, I did that, and it worked for a millisecond. But I’m not proud of it and never used it on a resume as an example of my creative leadership skills!

No, I was not innocent and denied my own sinful behavior towards them. Of course, there would never be healing in our relationships until I was able to admit that. I needed to seek and offer forgiveness before healing was possible. Not wait for someone else to take the first step.

Healing the wounds of the world must begin by first repairing our personal relationships. Because if I claim to love God but do not love my neighbor, I am a liar, a noisy, clanging symbol (1 John 4:20). Ouch.

Empowering Faith in a Secular World

January 24, 2025February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Boldness in adversity, Countering Donald Trump, Do Something, dying for hope, End of Religion, Energized by hope, For such a time as this, hope after the 2024 election, loving others, Lukewarm Christian

There are several examples in the Old and New Testament of people abandoning God and going their own way to do their own thing. Probably most notable for us is when Jesus was hauled away in the midst of his disciples – his friends – to be crucified. They instantly and collectively decided that was not something they signed up for and ran like hell.

Of course, the good news is that they came back stronger and more determined to follow Jesus’ example of God’s love for a broken world. This time they would not turn back. This time they would willingly die for him. And to that end, all but John became mortars. How do their lives compare with ours today? Well, the abandoning Jesus part lines up.

How did we get here?

Let’s start with statistics from the Pew Research Center: Today, about 28% of U.S. adults are religiously unaffiliated, describing themselves as atheists, agnostics, or “nothing in particular” when asked about their religion. In our latest data, 17% of “nones” identify as atheists, 20% say they are agnostic, and 63% choose “nothing in particular.”

Why?

When asked why they are not religious, two-thirds say they question a lot of religious teachings mainly because they don’t see those teachings lived out, or they don’t believe in God. “Many also bring up criticisms of religious institutions or people, including 47% who say that one extremely or very important reason why they are not religious is that they dislike religious organizations. And 30% say bad experiences they’ve had with religious people help explain why they are nonreligious.”

So, that doesn’t leave much more to dislike besides uncomfortable pews and bad music.

If you want to geek out on the research, here’s the link: https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2024/01/24/religious-nones-in-america-who-they-are-and-what-they-believe/

So, why does it matter?

Many researchers that have followed the attitudes of Gen Z’s, and Millennials in particular, believe it is linked decisively to Donald Trump’s election in 2016 and even more so in 2024.

I believe that if we have any chance of restoring care and compassion for each other and for those God calls us to love: the weak and vulnerable, we must open our hearts to those who have lost their way.

Matt. 5-14-16 tells us: “Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.”

How do we do that?

I’m glad you asked. It’s not going to be easy because we have to start with our own understanding of God’s love and what he is calling us to, and then have the courage and conviction it will require.

Let me share a bit of my own story that might help. Thirty years ago – give or take – I was a Youth Minister. Each year, the school allowed us to speak to the seventh graders about the Youth Program and invite them to come. We would have an initial event to start the year. I knew some of the boys came because there were girls there, and visa-versa.

I didn’t care what got them there. I just hoped we could offer them something special that would keep them there. To that end, we offered two big events during the year, and they both had to do with serving others.

On Thanksgiving Day, we went to a church in the inner city and delivered meals to the poor. Then, during the summer, we went to Georgia for a week-long service project, helping paint and fix up homes in the poorer areas of a community. It was a huge endeavor that brought large numbers of kids from several states together. Every night we gathered for prayer and celebration. Our kids were blown away by all of it!

But, here’s the beautiful part: The result of those two experiences didn’t end there. The kids shared the impact on their own lives. Thanksgiving had a whole new meaning for them. When we came back from Georgia they couldn’t get enough of opportunities to serve their own community. They would come up with things to do. For example: we started what we called “Rake and Run”. We would go to the homes of the elderly, rake their leaves, bag them, and sneak away (they loved the sneaking away part!)

For years, I have watched kids sit in church bored to tears – if they actually showed up. I’ve seen some parents drop them off at church and leave. Some of those kids didn’t even go inside. Youth programs were few and far between. Like the adults, they were just expected to go for that hour to get their card punched. Like that would somehow magically convert them into lovers of Christ and become His “hands and feet” in this broken world.

Making a change will not be easy or quick

Our country is overrun by heathens who are already wreaking havoc and will continue to destroy everything in their path. God only knows where it will end and how many innocent people will suffer. But, I do know this: if we care, we must step out with courage and conviction that comes from God alone.

This is not a time for fear, anger, or timidity. It’s a time for action! It’s a time to live the Beatitudes as God intended:

Being Poor in Spirit means to act with humility not hatred.

Mourning – calls us to recognize our sins and the sins of others. Not only the sin of hatred that we harbor in our hearts but also the sin of culpability when we excuse the sins of others – to have the courage to call them out.

Meekness – does not mean weakness, but to be submissive to the will of God, who calls us to love others.

Hunger and Thirst for Righteousness – this is a call not only for us to hunger for God, but as Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, and so many others, we are called beyond a hunger and thirst for God within ourselves, but also directed out to those who suffer.

Merciful – not simply feeling compassion for others in need. True, deep, inner compassion calls us outward to service and care for the most vulnerable.

Pure in Heart – not only speaks to what we do as believers but why we do it. The why informs our motivation.

Peacemaker – bringing people back to God, not by our words, but by our example.

Persecuted for Righteousness – If I am persecuted by others for loving and serving God then I am right where He wants me.

Are you ready?

God’s waiting for our response. He’s counting on us, with the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the examples of those in the trenches and those who have gone before us, like John Lewis, “Never, ever be afraid to make some noise and get in good trouble, necessary trouble.”

The Journey to Realness: Transforming Pain into Beauty

January 14, 2025February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in AHA moments, Boldness in adversity, Consider trials pure joy!, embrace change, forgiveness, grace, Healing, Humility, life's trials, occasions of grace, Our Imperfection, Uncategorized

I have wasted a great deal of time lamenting my aging body. If I ever had ambitions of being a swimsuit model, that’s off the table. You’re welcome!

The wrinkles and bags seem to multiply by the day. It’s why I never want my picture taken. I figured that when I die, and my kids put together that poster board of memories, the “latest” photo of me will be a Glamour Shot from thirty years ago!

Every seasonal change prompts me to donate clothes I don’t wear, haven’t worn for the past ten years, and will likely never fit into again. When I’m finished, the “pile” of items usually consists of a pair of socks someone gave me for Christmas. That’s it. Because – well – maybe I’ll lose weight next year. Hope springs eternal!

My frequent adventures into reality never end well, as they usually prompt me to eat copious amounts of chocolate! Until yesterday, when I read a meditation by my all-time favorite author and human, Kate Bowler. It was titled “Becoming Real”, in which she shares her creation of the “Gospel of the Velveteen Rabbit.” It brought me to tears – good and bad.

Bowler tells us how sad the rabbit is because he’s so worn from being drug around through life. He’s become tattered and torn and fears he’ll be cast aside. No longer his beautiful, fluffy, shiny self. His buddy, the Skin Horse, who’s been around much longer and is much wiser, tells him, “That’s how you become real.”

Bowler explains, “We become real through our wear and tear. By healing from the cruelty we didn’t deserve. By being loved imperfectly and loving imperfectly. In both, we change and keep changing. As the Skin Horse explains, ‘Generally, by the time you are real, most of your hair has been loved off (check), and your eyes drop out (kinda), and you get loose in the joints and very shabby (check and check). But these things don’t matter because once you are Real, you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.’”

As I reflected on this meditation about the beauty of “being Real,” I realized how much I have focused on the wrong things. I spent so much time lamenting my childhood, the abuse of my mother, the sexual abuse, feelings of being invisible because none of my teachers ever questioned my acting out in school, and an attempted suicide in my twenties. I never allowed myself to see the inner beauty that has made me “Real.”

The transformation of a self-centered, angry, lost little girl to the person God created me to be from the beginning should be a cause for celebration! Has that erased all the bad memories? No. But it has helped relegate them to the past, where they no longer affect my sense of who I am, my worth, and my dignity.

I would not be caring or thoughtful of myself or others, drawn towards serving others, or know how much I have to be grateful for had I not accepted this journey. Even with all its rough patches and dark places, it has made me more joyful and fulfilled than I ever could have imagined.

Oh, believe me, I have many moments of admonition from God when I screw up. More than I care to admit. But my heart is open to seeing my faults and correcting them quickly. I can only do that through a newfound humility and the grace of God.

Finding Peace in Uncertainty: Trusting God

January 7, 2025February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in "Experiencing" God, Boldness in adversity, Does god control?, life's trials, surrender

When your family is happy and healthy, your job seems secure, and the bills are paid –When everyone is doing what you demand, and no one challenges you – you’re certain your life is under control, and you have yourself to thank.

Life is good; God is in his heaven where he belongs, and that’s where you want him to stay. You’ve got this. You’re doing just fine. Thanks.

Then the bottom falls out: someone gets out of line and upsets your “plans”. Someone you love becomes desperately ill and dies. You lose your job and your security. You watch the murder of innocent children on the daily news, and your most certain assumptions about life are shaken to the core.

Everything is suddenly out of control, even the state of the country, which wasn’t even on your radar six months ago!

How did that happen? How will you handle it? Where do you turn? My guess is that you will fall apart, like I nearly did, and probably shake your fist at God in the process. You’re certain he could fix it if he wanted to, but he hasn’t, and that’s why you don’t trust him. Never mind that you’re doing a sucky job of controlling it yourself! Just sayin’.

So, You Dig In

Because you are now certain that God hasn’t got a clue or doesn’t care about what’s happening to you, to us, or to our world, you will take it upon yourself (as usual) to tell him how to fix things. You always have your list of demands on hand, so it requires little effort or thought to whip it out and shake it at him – like Santa with his naughty list.

But, what you will not do is fall on your knees in surrender to his will because surrender means defeat. It’s too risky and makes you vulnerable to a God you don’t trust in the first place.

If the question of who’s in control has not been settled for you, then your life will be wrought with uncertainty and fear when it’s assaulted and overrun by pain and sorrow. You won’t be able to handle that because you have not dealt with it in the calmness of daily life. You can’t wait until you’re thrown overboard to learn to swim. Peter tried it, and look where it got him.

God’s Got This

No doubt you have heard on more than one occasion, usually in church, that God is in control, not you. If you thought about it at all, it would likely be in those desperate moments in life when you had to face the reality that you have no power over anything or anyone beyond yourself. If you were honest about it, you’re also failing miserably at that! Which is probably why God hasn’t reached out to you for advice. Recall his words to Job, “Stand down, buddy. I’ll let you know when I need your advice!”

How well I know this to be true in my own life, and how long I frantically tried to deny it because I believed my peace and happiness depended on me. No one had ever proven themselves to be trustworthy, so the only way I could protect my fragile heart was to deny access to it by anyone – even God – especially God. How often I cried out to him to explain to me where he was when I was a child and being abused. Then sat in silence for an answer.

Often, when we hear “God is in control,” we frame it in the context of the sadness and suffering in our lives and in the world where it’s easy enough to deny. What kind of God would allow such suffering? It’s much easier to believe that he plopped us down here and left us on our own, “There you go. Have a nice life. Good luck – you’re gonna need it!”

What is critical to look at, first of all, is our understanding of free will. Second, we have a belief that God causes pain and suffering. But God is not in control of our choices. Most people are basically good; some do evil things. It’s a choice we make. Please know that I am not saying that mental illness is not a determining factor in some people’s choices, especially choices that are beyond our comprehension. That’s not what we’re talking about here.

We cannot understand, or possibly even accept, the notion of free will if we believe that God causes bad things to happen. Often, in the midst of a tragedy, someone will ask, “Why did God allow that?” – Or “My brother died even though we prayed faithfully for God to save him.” But sickness happens, relationships fall apart, natural disasters occur, and death is inevitable.

Father Richard Rohr asks, “Do you realize with what difficulty surrender will come to a fixing, managing mentality? Nothing in that psyche is prepared to understand the spiritual wisdom of surrender. Pain teaches a most counterintuitive thing—that we must go down before we even know what up is. Suffering of some sort seems to be the only thing strong enough to destabilize our arrogance and our ignorance.”

God is Always at Work for our Good

But God will have the last word. He will use the tragedies in our lives for his glory. That truth cannot be denied when we witness the compassion of strangers on the daily news when disaster strikes somewhere in the world. Sadly, the nightly news usually only highlights extreme cases like hurricanes and mass shootings. But I assure you that every day, someone, somewhere, is quietly going out of their way to offer kindness to a stranger who will never make the news.

I love this recent story: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/boy-gets-shopping-spree-after-giving-away-one-dollar-kelvin-ellis-matt-busbice-louisiana/

I thank God daily that my peace, contentment, and joy are not dependent on me! Surrendering our certitudes and obsessive need for answers in order to live our lives fully is the great paradox of our humanity. I believe that is what Jesus came to show us!

Those who suffer deeply, parents who have lost their precious children, the poor and the destitute, and those who know they are at the end of their broken lives have much to teach us about sorrow, and joy, and surrender. You see it, don’t you? In the aftermath of a terrible tragedy, something incomprehensible and beautiful unfolds. It’s God bursting into the hearts he created. Strangers reach out in love and compassion, families and neighbors draw closer together, and someone forgives the unforgivable.

It’s a necessary reminder that it’s okay to surrender our incessant need to control because God makes all things new.

God calls us to trust him in all things. In Revelations 21:4-5 we’re assured that:

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes.

Death will be no more.

Mourning no more, crying no more, pain no more.

And that he will make all things new.

Blessings and Peace!

I am sharing this post in January 2025. I suppose it has been sitting quietly in a folder for some time, waiting for this moment. My hope is that it will offer you peace in these uncertain times.

This is my prayer for you and your loved ones: (Numbers 6:24-26)

The Lord bless you

and keep you;

the Lord make his face shine on you

and be gracious to you;

the Lord turn his face toward you

and give you peace.

Finding Hope in Crisis: Lessons from History

December 10, 2024February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Boldness in adversity, Do Something, Energized by hope, fear, God's plan, hope after the 2024 election, loving others, Uncategorized

The disciples constantly nagged Jesus to tell them what was coming and what to expect, like the proverbial question from our kids: “Are we there yet?!”

Jesus’s speaking to them in parables probably frustrated them even more. Those parables spoke to their unrelenting insistence on knowing what was coming and how to prepare. In Luke 21, Jesus simply tells them to be alert and wait for God to reveal his plan and purpose to them—all in due time. He tries to assure them that God is still in control, no matter how it seems.

Now, here we are, clutching our pearls since the election, certain the apocalypse is near! And just like the disciples, God calls us to the only assurance we need: He is still in control.

So, we all need to take a collective deep breath, exhale, and consider our reality in light of the work of those who are already moving to shore up our democracy and the words of those who have gone before us who fought the powers of evil in their own time. (I share an excellent resource at the end of this post)

Dr. Barbara Holmes offered her thoughts on the necessity of contemplation when a crisis arises:

“The crisis begins without warning, shatters our assumptions about the way the world works, and changes our story and the stories of our neighbors. The reality that was so familiar to us is gone suddenly, and we don’t know what is happening….

If life, as we experience it, is a fragile crystal orb that holds our daily routines and dreams of order and stability, then sudden and catastrophic crises shatter this illusion of normalcy. The crises … are usually precipitated by circumstances beyond the ordinary. I am referring to oppression, violence, pandemics, abuses of power, natural disasters, and planetary disturbances.

Contemplation after or during crisis is a stillness in the aftermath of a primal scream, the abyss of unknowing, and the necessity of surviving the trauma together.”

So many of us are now in full crisis mode, and there is no telling how much worse it’s going to get over the coming years.

I believe people on both sides are dealing with their own life struggles. Fear and uncertainty are at the forefront of those concerns, and we can react differently to them. I get that.

The bottom line for me is that I am still called to love and care for others and to be an example of Christ in the world. How did I get here – from running around with my hair on fire to settling into acceptance of the reality we now face? How have I found hope and trust that we can overcome and end up stronger from the experience, even when we have no idea what will happen? I look to those heroes of faith who have gone before us.

There have been so many examples of those who faced seemingly impossible circumstances to make a difference in the world. I don’t pretend to be anywhere near their stature, but I hope to do what I’m called to do within my own capacity – to shine a light, even if it’s just a small candlelight, in the darkness.

As long as humans have been in existence, there has been violence and war somewhere in the world. Though we don’t know what to expect in the coming years in America, we see the innocent in Ukraine and the Middle East suffer untold horrors that we watch on our daily news feeds, and that’s frightening.

But, what we don’t see on the news is the stories of Ukrainians who courageously go about their lives in the midst of it. This is from an article by HOPE International, “Ukrainian believers continue to walk in God’s leading in times of war, just as they had done in times of peace. Despite the devastation Russia inflicts on their country, the Ukrainian spirit will not be broken. We will continue to see Ukrainian believers serving on the front lines of a courageous response, daily finding ways to love God and love their neighbors.” https://blog.hopeinternational.org/2023/06/28/the-heartbeat-of-hope-in-ukraine/

We, too, must trust in God each day to give us all we need, not to simply survive but to thrive and bring hope and care to those who suffer at the hands of evil. If not us, then who?

The following are amazing examples of that light in the darkness: Martin Luther King, Mahatma Gandhi, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Nelson Mandela, Anne Frank, Oscar Romero, and Jesus. Let’s not forget Jesus.

During the Vietnam War, Thomas Merton said, “We are living through the greatest crisis in the history of man….far from being irrelevant, prayer, meditation, and contemplation are of the utmost importance in America today.”

Maximilian Maria Kolbe volunteered to die in place of another man at Auschwitz during World War II. “The most deadly poison of our times is indifference.”

Dietrich Bonhoeffer was hanged for his resistance to Hitler. “Silence in the face of evil is itself evil: God will not hold us guiltless. Not to speak is to speak. Not to act is to act.”

Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated during the civil rights movement “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was assassinated as he led the nonviolent resistance against British rule in India. “The day the power of love overrules the love of power, the world will know peace.”

Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela spent twenty-seven years in prison because of his anti-apartheid activism. “To deny people their human rights is to challenge their very humanity.”

And let’s not forget these powerful words of Genesis 50:20, “God uses the evil perpetrated against us for His good and makes all things new”.

Lastly, I have been following Andrea Chalupa. She is an amazing Ukrainian-American Journalist and Filmmaker. Here is a link to her podcast with lots of action guides: https://www.gaslitnationpod.com/action-guide

Never, Never, Never Give Up!

November 18, 2024February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Boldness in adversity, Energized by hope, If not us, then who?, the suffering need our care

As soon as I opened my eyes this morning I started ruminating on the negativity of our new reality since the elections. Then, I looked at my phone and realized that I missed my grandson’s concert at his school yesterday. I was devastated and felt terrible.

Am I trading enjoyment and purpose for loss and fear even when I try to convince myself that God is still present and still has a plan for me, for all of us? I’ve been so stressed about what is likely coming that it has consumed me with angst and dread, in particular for those most vulnerable. But if I continue to dwell on things that I can’t change or control, I will surely miss the beautiful parts of my life right now.

There are certain things that have not, and will not change, no matter what lies ahead: We are all called to care for those God cares most deeply for: The lost, the broken, the suffering. He is surely heartbroken when so many people refuse his call to fulfill their life’s purpose in whatever way he has gifted them. And I am also saying “no” when I want to check out of life.

Debie Thomas speaks of our interconnectedness, “We cause pain and loss when we hold ourselves apart, ….it’s especially challenging to do so now. We live in bitterly divided times. We have good reasons to be cautious and self-protective….Whether we like it or not, our lives are bound up in God’s and in each other’s. The only true life we will live in this world is the life we consent to live in relationship, messy and entangled though it might be.”  

What brought it all home for me were two readings from yesterday. First came the reading of the Prodigal Son’s brother, “then he became angry and refused to go in.” The author of this meditation asks, ”Are you angry and refusing to participate in some space in your life? Is an invitation waiting for you, too, if you can set aside your resentment and anger?”

Oops…Gulp

Next came the Benedictine mediation for that day in which I previously highlighted these words:

“Benedictine spirituality is about coming to a sense of the fullness of life. (It) never gives up on life. Why? Because every day we have gives us another chance to become the real persons we were meant to be. The point, perhaps, is to never give up on life and never doubt that every bit of kindness, every tender touch we lay upon another in life can heal what might otherwise have died, certainly in them, perhaps even in ourselves.”

So, God has spoken to me profoundly in these last few days. He couldn’t be clearer if he tried, even for a hard-head like me!

God needs us now, more than ever, to stay strong in faith, to be that beacon on the hill that he calls us to be in Matthew 5:14, 16, “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”

A Call to Grandparents: Now is Our Time!

October 5, 2024February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in grandparents wisdom, Religion's failure with youth, youth suicide

When my husband and I married fifty years ago, I went into that relationship as a card-carrying heathen with an attitude, short skirts, and a Dolly Parton wig! No, I’m not kidding!

When I first met his mother, I prepared myself for the anticipated rejection I was used to. To my surprise, that isn’t what happened. She accepted me with all my obvious failings and I didn’t know how to deal with that.

Her faith, kindness, and care for others helped me see what was missing in my life. She blessed me more than she ever knew.

When I reflect on that experience and compare it to the young people today, I recognize some profound realities:

First, this from the CDC: From 2013 to 2023, there were increases in students’ experiences of violence, signs of poor mental health, and suicidal thoughts and behaviors.

Secondly, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the above statistics coincide with the fact that young people have been fleeing churches in huge numbers for years, feeling they have nothing to offer but “religion” without substance.

Theologian Jennifer Bailey tells us, “Indeed, millennials and Generation Z successors to the throne of youth are turning away from institutional religion faster than any other age group, raising a palpable sense of panic in religious communities concerned about their future.”

But God’s love can reach into that emptiness with a new and vibrant excitement for hope and promise.

I remember that moment so many years ago as I questioned what had drawn me to my mother-in-law. When I finally recognized it, there was no turning back. Yes, I will admit, it was a path to God that was full of fits and starts. It often still is, and I’ve walked along the edges much of the time.

This was also a powerful message for me in my chaplaincy at the Juvenile Detention Center. Recently, the kids witnessed the incredible story of Darren Seals. He lived the life many of the kids there are also living. He challenged them to think about their actions and showed them such love as he spoke!

He is a man who should never have survived his gang experiences and being shot 13 times. As he was speaking, his mother lay dying in the hospital. Tears welled up as he recounted the grief he caused her over the years. Yet when he left her side to go to speak to the kids, she told him to continue his work and how proud she was of him!

So, I would like to focus on Darren’s mother now. As the grandmother of 14 and great-grandmother of 18, I can’t imagine the heartache and fear she felt all those years as he lost his way. But I can imagine her joy in seeing him use his gifts and life experiences to give kids hope in what they often feel is a life wrought with hopelessness.

We, the privileged, have no idea how much so many of our youth are suffering. Do we even care? And, how many of us “elder” folks have also been made to feel they have no further purpose in life? We should just rock away whatever time we have left. No one really wants to listen to advice from old people. Right? Wrong!

Choctaw elder and retired Episcopal bishop Steven Charleston explains how Indigenous elders carry the wisdom of the past in service of the present and future:

Elders are a people of the future. My culture respects the elders not only because of their wisdom, but because of their determination. The elders are tough. They have survived many struggles and many losses. Now, as they look ahead to another generation, they are determined that their sacrifices will not have been in vain, that their children’s children will not grow up in a world more broken than the one they sought to repair. The elders are voices of justice. They are champions for the earth. They defend the conscience of the community. We follow the elders because they have a passion for tomorrow. They are people of the future, not the past.”

Theologian Jennifer Bailey:

All around us, things are shifting, systems are collapsing, and institutions are failing. This should not surprise us. It is clear to me that the actions we take now will have deep and irreversible consequences for the generations to come….

The enormity of the plight we face can be solved only by harnessing the ingenuity and creativity of the communities to which we belong and are accountable. This season will require us to recover ancestral wisdom and practices that we lost or undervalued, repair the deep breaches in our interpersonal and communal relationships that replicate patterns of harm and destruction, and reimagine the possible by stretching ourselves to see beyond the realities of our current circumstances and daring to dream something different into being.”

Alrighty then. I believe God has given us a purpose and calling to get off our rockers! There’s work to do. I’m not sure what that means for you, but God knows. As he watches his beloved children suffer and die, he longs for us to take his love to them. We all have a stake in this.

There are so many opportunities to serve. For example, several people go to our Detention Centers to shoot hoops with the boys, do crafts, tutor, and attend the Sunday services.

If your heart is open, God will guide you.

My Journey to Finding True Purpose and Self-Acceptance

August 9, 2024February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in "Experiencing" God, A Holy Whack, AHA moments, Boasting, grace, Humility, Our Imperfection, serving others

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Oh, the games we play. I know them well. I’ve been playing them all my life. The games that hide our suffering, that mask our own sinfulness, and help us survive.

Growing up, I was always made to believe I was not worthy of love or care. So, I tried desperately to find my worth in things and accomplishments.

I have been artificially propped up by an ego that is always on the alert for another opportunity to impress others, starting years ago as a youth minister and then at Youth-in-Need, hospice, and working with the homeless.

Being pumped up by the admiring comments of others filled a void, “Oh, I admire you for what you do. It takes a special person to do that.” I pretended to brush off the comment while secretly hoping this would be the year I would receive the Time Magazine Person of the Year award. I kinda gave up on that one. I know…shocking!

Are you impressed yet? Do you know who isn’t impressed? Who’s saddened by this litany of “accomplishments” by yours truly? GOD!

1 Cor. 7 speaks directly to the ego, ^“What are you so puffed up about? What do you have that God hasn’t given you? And if all you have is from God, why act as though you are so great and as though you have accomplished something on your own?” Ouch!

In hindsight, I know God was present in all of this. He watched and waited for my AHA moments; for those moments, I could clearly see my shallow attempts to feed the hunger and loneliness of others – all while denying my own.

And those AHA moments were truly profound! Moments when my initial shallowness transformed into compassion and empathy for those I was serving. That’s how God works. He was converting my heart right in the midst of my brokenness.

So, there’s my story—the good, bad, and ugly. And this is my hope – that I am finally recognizing the person I was created to be and the purpose I am to fulfill for whatever time I have left here: to truly point others to God and not myself.

I’m not sure what tomorrow’s going to look like – but I am sure I’m in good hands! I will leave you with this beautiful song by Casting Crowns: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eQd3K2Fxp4

God’s Audacious Promise of Hope Always Fulfilled

July 28, 2024February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Boldness in adversity, Consider trials pure joy!, Energized by hope, fear, Good News, hope

This post shares quotes from others I admire so much—those who may or may not have always had hope in God’s promises when the world was saying something very different. But they persevered, and so can we!

There are about 80+ Bible verses telling us not to be afraid! But here we are—afraid of what is happening in the world today—shutting ourselves off and preparing for the apocalypse. What I’m hoping is that we can all take a deep breath and get on with the business of abundantly living our lives and helping others to do the same.

Let’s start with Hebrews 10:22-23 (Msg), “So let’s do it—full of belief….Let’s keep a firm grip on the promises that keep us going. He always keeps his word.” There’s nothing ambiguous about that.

Richard Rohr:

“We are energized by the hope of God’s promises. What gives us the energy and power to keep moving is the promise, the dream, the vision of what could be and what’s beyond the moment….they’re not always what we expect or hope for, and so God calls us a little further. This is the way that divine love stretches our hearts. God’s promises energize and expand the heart, deepening our capacity for life and our quality of being in this world. That’s what the promises of God do—lead us to the experience of deeper life.”

Desmond Tutu:

Dear Child of God, before we can become God’s partners, we must know what God wants for us. “I have a dream,” God says. “Please help Me to realize it. It is a dream of a world whose ugliness and squalor and poverty, its war and hostility, its greed and harsh competitiveness, its alienation and disharmony are changed into their glorious counterparts, when there will be more laughter, joy, and peace, where there will be justice and goodness and compassion and love and caring and sharing.”

Dan Rather:

“Let us hope that we stand up to those who would wreak havoc and death. Let us hope that we continue to try to find ways to lessen suffering so that violence doesn’t feel like the only option for those who are desperate. Let us never give up on yearning for peace.

The pull of our humanity is what gives us a reason to smile when we see what is good and beautiful in our world. But it also is what provokes such sadness when we know others are in pain. We need to hold onto both the good and the bad so we can hold onto each other. We need to remember all that we have in common as we try to cope with the difficult realities of life.”

Thomas Merton:

“We did not come here to breathe the rarified air beyond the suffering of this world. We came here to carry the suffering of the whole world in our hearts. Otherwise, there’s no validity in living in a place like this.”

Martin Luther King:

“I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.’

I have a dream that one day, on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

With this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith, we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood.”

Henri Nouwen:

“Hope is willing to leave unanswered questions unanswered and unknown futures unknown. Hope makes you see God’s guiding hand not only in the gentle and pleasant moments but also in the shadows in disappointment and darkness.”

And…last but not least:

Learning from Moses: Embracing Responsibility and Change

July 6, 2024February 19, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in A Holy Whack, Consider trials pure joy!, embrace change, God's plan

How many people throughout history have struggled and spent all their energy blaming everyone else for their pain: parents, co-workers, despicable neighbors? They would rather go down in flames than admit to their own faults. I’ve been there and often have to catch myself when I slip back there.

How about those Israelites as an example? Follow their trail from captivity to freedom. God heard their cries for years. I’m not sure why he made them wait through a few generations before he responded. No doubt he had a good reason. But, he finally did enlist Moses to go take care of it.

Remember that Moses was trying to live a quiet and unassuming life since that whole fiasco of him murdering and hiding the body of an Egyptian. He felt pretty comfy until God jumped out of a burning bush and surprised the c*#p out of him.

That’s what God was saving him for: “Pack up your stuff and go save the Israelites from Pharaoh.” Personally, I would ask for more details of his expectations and surety of the outcome before committing. That probably comes from years of abuse by an unyielding and demanding mother. In those God-calling moments, all I see is an authority figure I was supposed to feel safe with and trust. And my inner child screams, “RUN, IT’S A TRAP!”

If you think about it, Moses could have had abandonment issues while he was floating in the river in that basket for however long that lasted. He, too, could have feared trusting God (there were no therapists back then to help him sort through his issues). That could also be why he shoved Aaron in front of him, trying to get God to send him instead.

Anyway, Moses wasn’t really keen on the idea of confronting Pharaoh and tried to get out of it. But God wouldn’t have it. So he went…kicking and screaming. I think he was secretly excited when Pharaoh told him to take a flying leap, “See, God. He’s not budging. I’ll be going now.” But God stopped him in his tracks and had him sit through the litany of plagues, ten to be exact, that he rained down on Egypt:

Blood
Frogs
Lice
Flies
Pestilence
Boils
Hail
Locusts
Darkness
Killing of the firstborn

At last, Pharaoh relented. His patience expended; he told Moses to get them out of his sight. All the while, Moses had his sandals and toothbrush packed just in case. So they all scurried out of Egypt before Pharaoh changed his mind.

Now, the fun started. The Israelite’s story is strewn with whining and complaining at every turn, “There’s no water, this manna stuff sucks, my tent-mate snores.” Blah. Blah. Blah. How quickly they forgot how torturous their lives were in Egypt as they labored under cruel and unimaginable circumstances.

Now fast-forward. Remember when they were tent camping at the foot of the mountain, eating beans, roasting marshmallows over an open fire, and singing cowboy ballots while they waited for Moses to return from his historical visit with God?

Wait, no, that’s the wrong scene. Sorry…

Anyway, surely you know this part of the story. Right? Bolts of thunder and lightning and God up close and personal. “No thanks! We’ll wait here.” They all gave Moses a high-five and “ATTA BOY, you got this” pep talk. Then, they waited at a safe distance. No doubt some bet on God pulling Moses into that burning bush, and that would be the last of him. They just weren’t trusting any of it.

And while we’re on the subject of us messy humans, let’s not forget that Moses wasn’t the poster child for perfection. I mean, he did kill that Egyptian and bury him under a pile of rocks. And he did tell God “No” several times when he didn’t like his plan. And, he whined incessantly about the Israelites whining.

Can you hear the “IT’S NOT FAIR!” mantra that must have droned on and on from all of them for FORTY. LONG. YEARS?

So, what about us? This is the point where we need to look in the mirror and try our damndest to deny that we do the same thing over and over and over again. Come on, you know I’m right. We do it so often it probably slips by our consciousness.

Okay, you sit there staring in that mirror if you want to, trying to excuse yourself to the God who knows better. I’m moving on. Though I’m not really sure how that’s going to work if I stay tethered to my past.

Letting go of the known, even if it’s negative thoughts and feelings that serve no good purpose, is just plain scary. So often, we would rather stay right where we know what to expect than risk the vulnerability that is sure to accompany something new and uncertain.

Looking back at the abuse of my mother, as bad as it was, I knew exactly what she would do and how to dodge the bullets so-to-speak. It became so commonplace it was almost a game at times. And when she tripped herself up, like the time she chased me up the ladder on our bunk beds and it fell backward, I probably felt a great deal of satisfaction. At least until she got her hands on me.

There is a flip side to that coin. Now that I’m adult(ish) and have no one to answer to, I also have no one to blame but myself if things go sideways. Which, I believe, is how God intended it. Taking responsibility for our actions and cleaning up our own messes in the process is how we are called to live in this unpredictable, messy life.

“Bad” Kids and “Hopeless” Saints

Featured by Linda Russell, posted in bad kids, Healing, hope, If not us, then who?

I recently completed chaplaincy training for my church, making me a “certified” Lay Chaplain – yeah, me! My long-held desire to work with kids in Juvenile Detention will soon be realized.

During this celebratory moment, I had an encounter with someone that I did not see coming. When I excitedly told him about my graduation and plans to work with the kids, he said, “Oh, the bad kids”. Alrighty then – a remark from a “Christian” kid who wants for nothing.

That was the conversation that prompted this post. My immediate response to him was that there are no “bad” kids, just kids who have made bad choices, often in the midst of circumstances likely out of their control. I know those kids well, having been one myself. No, I was never in jail, but there were times I came close.

Over many years, I have worked with kids in varied ministries and jobs and have shared those stories in past posts. I’ll tell you about two that profoundly impacted my life:

It all started about forty years ago when I decided it would be fun to put together a youth group at our church. I wasn’t really “qualified” to lead a youth program, so I embarked on a three-year Youth Ministry Studies Program.

I came out on the other side, brought together some amazing young adults to help lead it, and it took off. It didn’t seem too intimidating. You know, “good” kids just having fun together and learning a bit about God at the same time.

I recall one incident during that time that deeply impacted me! Two brothers came. One of them, I’ll call him John, always seemed to be bored to death. I often witnessed his brother’s cruel remarks toward him in front of everyone, but this kid kept coming every week.

One time, we put our chairs in a circle for a discussion. John pulled his chair up outside the circle, slumped back, and folded his arms, signaling total indifference. Subtle but noticeable. So, I asked a question. A few of the kids responded, and then John responded. I said to him, “That’s a great answer, John. I would not have thought of that!” Then, he looked at his brother, smiled smugly, and pulled his chair into the circle. Subtle again, right? Until you know his story. Then you realize how profound that gesture was.

John’s family was a mess. His brother excelled in everything he did, and their parents often reminded him of his failings and how he should be more like his brother. His brother also jumped on that ridicule train and criticized him every chance he got. So, his seemingly understated act of pulling his chair into the circle was huge!

A few years later, I went to work for Youth-In-Need and met a kid who challenged my authority – which I wore as a badge of honor. – “Don’t mess with me, I’m in control here, kid!” I’ll call him Justin. God called him my teacher.

I don’t think Justin ever knew his real identity as a “beloved child of God”. It’s likely that no one ever told him that in his short twelve years of life. I lived that story for years myself, and I sometimes still fall back into a false belief that I’m not worthy.

Anyway, here he was at Youth-In-Need, where I worked as a glorified house-mom. Troubled kids came there just before they ended up in Juvenile Detention if our therapists couldn’t help them get their lives together.

Justin was always angry and pounding his fist on anything that didn’t pound back. On his worst night, we felt we had to contact the on-call therapist. I went downstairs to the office, called her, and explained the situation. She asked if I felt threatened. If I said “yes,” they would have sent the police to take him away.

At that moment, God reached into my exhausted and hardened heart and broke through my stubborn will to control. I told her “no,” I did not feel threatened and that it would be fine.

As soon as I hung up, Justin, who was listening at the door, burst into the office, still angry, “You gonna call the police?! Go ahead, I don’t care! I’m not afraid of you!” I told him that I was not going to call the police and to just go upstairs, get his shower, and go to bed.

Out of somewhere came the words, “And, Justin, if you want a hug, I’ve got one for you.” To which he quickly replied, “Yeah, right!” and slammed the door when he left. While filling out the incident report, I thought, “Yeah, right. What was I thinking?”

When I walked upstairs, he came out of the bathroom, clearly not angry anymore. He looked at me and asked, “Can I have that hug now?” I hugged that kid so hard, wondering if he had ever been hugged. Had anyone ever made him feel worthy of love?

Here is a beautiful quote from Father Gregory Boyle. Working with gang members in L.A. he founded and directs Homeboy Industries. “You stand with the least likely to succeed until success is succeeded by something more valuable: kinship. You stand with the belligerent, the surly, and the badly behaved until bad behavior is recognized for the language it is: the vocabulary of the deeply wounded and of those whose burdens are more than they can bear.”

Do you know how many Saints could also have been defined as “bad” kids? A lot! Here are just two that come to mind for me:

St. Moses the Black

Saint Moses was an enslaved Ethiopian in Egypt in the fourth century. He murdered someone, got kicked out of his master’s house, and became the leader of a band of murderers and robbers. After an AHA moment, determined to change his ways and repent of his sins, he attempted to enter a monastery and become a monk but wasn’t well received because the monks didn’t trust his sincerity. It took a long time to convince them that he had changed. They eventually accepted him, and he also was instrumental in the conversion of some in his former band of robbers.

St. Augustine

He was also a piece of work. Augustine described himself as a “very bad little boy.” He admitted to being full of anger, a liar, a thief, and a cheat!

We hear about his mother’s fervent praying for his lost soul, but they also had a terrible relationship. He was mean to her, and there was a two-year period when they didn’t speak to each other.

Augustine continued to struggle with his sins and passions even after his conversion.

So, there you go. We should never assume that any kid is innately “bad”, no matter their actions. Kathy Escobar reminds us to “look the outcast in the eye and remind them of their worth” because it is likely that no one has ever done that.”

I plan to take all of the God moments and lessons I’ve learned into the Detention Center every time I have the opportunity to love on the kids! Deep down, I want them to know that God will not punish them until they cry “uncle”. He won’t try to scare them into submission like so many of their parents or guardians likely did.

I want to say to all of them, “God wants to love you so fiercely that you will cry – with the joy of knowing you are his beloved, and there’s nothing you can do about it!” I want to help them sort through the kurfuffle they have likely dealt with all their lives. And, yes, I will use the word “kurfuffle” because they’ll love it! I’m going to laugh and cry with them. Then I’ll go home, thank God for another opportunity to love as Jesus loves, take a nap, and do it all over again and again – for as long as I can!

Who knows? Maybe I’ll be known as the kurfuffle-busting granny. They may invite me to their graduations, weddings, and baby baptisms!

And, finally – hopefully – when God’s plan for me has been fulfilled, and I stand before him, I will hear those magical words, “Well, Linda, what a ride, huh?! I will say you got on my last nerve at times, but kudos and well done my good and faithful servant! Oh yeah, and bonus, you can stop counting calories now!”

Death – Our Uninvited Teacher

Featured by Linda Russell, posted in AHA moments, Boldness in adversity, Consider trials pure joy!, death's lessons, Good Friday

I wrote the following Blog post on 4/2/2021 (Good Friday), having no idea that my husband would pass away just fifteen days later. The words are now more poignant than ever. I have added my thoughts since his passing at the end.

Every death diminishes me

Every Good Friday, we are called to remember the brutal beating and crucifixion of Jesus. He walked in the midst of those deemed lesser and unimportant. They experienced his love and compassion for them. But he walked a lonely road to his death. Sure, a few dared to walk with him (ahem…the women!). But many, his disciples in particular, scattered for their own safety, feeling powerless to stop it from happening.

Also, we are reliving the horrific facts of George Floyd’s death during Derek Chauvin’s trial. Hearing the witnesses’ testimony as they broke down and grieved over watching Floyd die has been excruciating for many. Most witnesses were strangers to him, yet they all spoke of feeling helpless and guilty that they didn’t try to help him. Even though they also knew they were powerless to do so.

Jesus was innocent of any crime. George Floyd was not. But the fact remains that neither deserved to die so violently at the hands of others.

So, I sit and contemplate how their deaths have impacted me. As a professed Christian, I am called to emulate Jesus’ radical love in every aspect of my life. I mostly fail, but I keep trying and longing to be more like him and less like me.

And George Floyd? I didn’t know him and likely never would have, nor would most of us, if not for witnessing his horrific death on the daily news.

In those beautiful and poignant words of John Donne, “No man is an island; entire of itself…any man’s death diminishes me because I am involved in mankind.”

That is a fact of God’s making. We are all interconnected – like it or not. The death of another, be it a loved one or a stranger, should call us to stop and take inventory of our own lives. Every funeral I attend does that for me and often shines a light on my failings to be Christ-like to others. Thankfully, every day is a new day – a day to begin again.

Wake up!

So, here’s what I will contemplate and pray about and hopefully act on daily. It doesn’t have to be Jesus who calls us to be better, kinder, softer, and to live and love more fully. It can also be the death of a stranger we have never met that wakes us from sleepwalking through life.

Facing the realization that we will also die (sorry if that’s news to you) – maybe sooner than later (sorry again) – should cause us to ask ourselves if our houses are in order and, more importantly, what we are leaving behind because…

Death doesn’t care

Death does not care if we have left business unfinished, relationships broken, or children to be raised. It doesn’t matter if we are not ready or sit on promises to change. It will take the weak with the strong, the humble with the proud, the saint with the jerk.

Death doesn’t respect wedding plans, vacation plans, or unmet deadlines. It does not operate by a timetable we set and is no respecter of age. It does not discriminate between the most loved or most hated. It may not wait for the most brilliant to cure cancer, bring peace to a troubled world, or receive a Nobel Prize.

Denying that death is a part of life doesn’t change its reality. We can’t rely on death to come when we are ready. But we can depend on it to teach those of us who are willing how to truly live.

Death can and should be a time of reflection.

Have I lived well, loved well, forgiven — honestly – and sought forgiveness humbly?

For good or bad, I have touched the lives of family and friends, the mailman, and the grumpy receptionist at the doctor’s office. I may have amassed wealth and recognition and left a fortune to my loved ones. All things they can pack away, gamble away, or throw away. But, at the end of the day…what have I left in their hearts?

So now?

As I contemplate the reality that my life has changed drastically, my beliefs have not.

The suddenness of my husband’s death has not made me fearful or anxious, as I know God’s love and care for me have always been steady and unchanging, even when I have so often failed to appreciate it. But, at the same time, it drives home the fact that my own life is not guaranteed beyond this moment. So, what does that mean?

My life is filled with many moments of disbelief that my husband is actually gone. I’m sure that will continue for some time. But, in the midst of that, as I daily make decisions about how I am to “live and move and have my being” (Acts 17:28) – I am discovering my better self, my true self, not the self on display when others are watching.

I am asking critical questions that will surely determine my life’s direction, purpose, and focus for whatever time I have left here. How will/should I live my life moving forward? What do I want my loved ones to remember when I’m gone?

God longs for us to use the gifts he has given us to leave the world better than we found it. How will I do that? How will I serve in this time of such need and suffering? Every moment of every day allows us to grow in love and compassion for all those we encounter on this journey.

There truly are gifts in the midst of our goodbyes. What do I want mine to be? What do you want yours to be?

Failure Will Not Have the Last Word

December 16, 2022February 11, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Boldness in adversity, fear of failure, God's plan

Funny word, “failure”. We tend to judge everything that misses the mark according to our expectations: Anything that does not invoke praise and accolades from others is deemed a failure. The times I have whined to God in deep sorrow for my failings have grown beyond my ability to number them.

Lord, I know this was from you – I did it – I failed at it – I am a despicable wretch! For example: remember way back in 2001, when You said, “Write a book”, and I did? I am yet to see it on the New York Times best-seller list. Your book would have been #1 on that list – forever!”

The Bible comes to mind. “No disrespect, but why didn’t You just write it yourself? I mean, really. Countless people have written and rewritten it until the essence of Your message is often blurred and confusing.“

God: “Are you finished, Linda?”

Me: Oops (a Job moment), “Yes. Sorry.”

God: “I’m not interested in how the world views your work. I am ONLY interested in how you trust and obey Me. I thought your story of surrendering to Me was beautiful. Okay, there were a few typos. But, that part about ‘giving birth’? I’m still laughing at that one. So, will you please quit your whining!?”

When we are obsessed with the outcomes success and failure, trusting in God’s plan can become obscured by fear. Often, I read these magnificent words from Thomas Merton to remind myself of God’s call for me to trust Him:

“My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that my desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.”

I have learned countless lessons about trusting God. Many of my attempts were wrought with uncertainty and assumptions of failure throughout eleven years of my book-writing adventure. But I knew without a doubt it was God speaking to my heart from the beginning. His words, “Write a book”, were not cloaked in ambiguity. They were clear and undeniable.

The book’s first edition (yes, there have been two) was an unbelievably daunting and very expensive – as in $10,000 expensive – challenge. God made it sound simple enough. But, here’s where I began to falter: I made some very costly errors in judgment when choosing the Editor, and the book was published with several issues. I was angry with the publisher (that soon after went out of business) and myself and proceeded to complain to God.

Through tears of disappointment and self-doubt, I wanted to know why He had directed me to write a book when I understood nothing about the process that would ensue. I felt I had failed Him because everything seemed to go wrong. So, here’s God, ears covered, “Blah, blah, blah, I can’t hear you. Get it published.” Fine. I attempted many times to offer it to publishers, becoming the recipient of more rejections than Charles Manson when he tried to find a date for the prom! So, I self-published it.

After the fact, I read a book about self-publishing. Wanna know what it said? “NEVER, write a book FIRST! Get your name out there with published articles, establish a following, and then write your book.” Apparently, God failed to read that book.

Anyway, I was confused about how to proceed. Did I mention that I had 2500 books delivered to my doorstep and knew nothing about marketing? Did I mention that?! Then, to my utter amazement, people actually bought the book; people not even related to me!

The next surprise? The publication and subsequent sales, (though nothing earth-shaking for sure) of my very imperfect book led to a few speaking engagements – a notion that I found incomprehensible since I had never felt the slightest longing to stand in front of an audience and reveal my true self.

All my attention-grabbing stunts during my childhood had been designed to hide the real me! The very idea of speaking to a group of people horrified the adult me. I wanted to slap myself silly for saying “yes” without consulting my more reluctant self. What a long list of grumblers I follow: Moses (Exodus 4:10-17) and Jeremiah (Jeremiah 4-9), just to name two we know well.

Did I mention that the book is now in its second edition (edited more professionally)? I’m still not sure why. Still no call from the New York Times or Oprah. But – and here is where God has wanted me all along – it doesn’t matter if I sell even one. I am happy to give them away. God said, “Write”, – so I wrote. Everything else is fodder for Satan.

I, like Job, learned the hard way to accept being on a need-to-know basis when I feel God calling me, like Abraham (Genesis 12:1-3), to get on my camel and ride. No GPS, no roadmap, no crystal ball. I now find myself enjoying the adventure, even with blindfolds on!

So the next time you find yourself making room on the shelf for your next trophy, only to stare at the empty space it should have been placed in, try sitting quietly with the lesson. It’s there. Pray and wait for it.

When you are passed over for the job rightfully yours, stop to consider the lesson. When your plans to join a mission team in Haiti are dashed because you could not raise the funds – you got it – stop and listen to God. There’s a lesson there somewhere.

I can never give up trusting that God’s plan for me is PERFECT, even if everyone else tells me I am a pathetic loser!

Oh, and if you’re interested in a book, I have a few hundred still available – free. Just contact me!

If Not Us…Then Who?

December 15, 2022January 26, 2023 by Linda Russell, posted in Do Something, If not us, then who?, loving others

O, Jesus:

We seek you in places you have already left

and fail to see you when you stand before us.

You interrupt our comfort with your nakedness.

Touch our possessiveness with your poverty.

You challenge our smugness with your humility.

You came so we could touch you with our own hands.

Yet we refuse to touch those you love most deeply.

You are at once: sign and hope and stumbling block.

Your insistent call disturbs our settled lives.

May we neither cling to our pain nor refuse

to embrace the cost when it is required of us.

O God:

You drive us into the desert to search out your Truth.

Uncover our injustice and arrogance and stir us to a new vision

of your outrageous, relentless, extravagant Love.

You urge us beyond all reason to love our enemies with that same Love.

Disarm our judgments and criticisms with your radical mercy.

You are gift, you are hope, you are joy meant to be taken to those who sit in darkness.

Let no fear or doubt hold us back from that calling.

Because…

If not us…then who?

Acting ‘As If’: A Path to Healing and Growth

December 10, 2022February 9, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in AHA moments, Boldness in adversity, Consider trials pure joy!, embrace change, God's plan

(Original post-2021)

Well, I’m still here in case you were wondering – or even if you couldn’t care less (in which case, I don’t suppose you’d be reading this). Regardless, here we go…

For over a year, I went kicking and screaming into a sudden and uncertain reality. In the process, I have slowly, often unwillingly, been discovering who I am in the midst of loss, pain, and sorrow. The world I thought would never change – changed – without any warning. NOT FAIR!

I reasoned (something my A.D.D. brain should know by now to question) that it was time for a change. So, I packed up my former self, one box, one picture, one memory at a time. I suddenly realized I had been trying to suppress the uncertainty of my future with superficial words and inadequate certitudes, “I’m fine. Really!” – even though it may appear that I’m losing my shit!

Some “experts” encourage us to act “as if” _________(fill in the blank) until it becomes our truth. So, I did – or at least I tried. But, in pretending I was already there, I believe I also denied the necessary process of change. So, does acting “as if” my life is often a total shitstorm count? Because right now it is – no acting required.

Jen Hatmaker beautifully describes the inevitable change of seasons in life, “It can be difficult to envision a new start but impossible to deny one. This is your work. No one can do it for you. Something doesn’t have to be bad to be over. That season has possibly given you everything it had to offer; it shaped and developed you, and it stretched and inspired you. We are not entirely rebranded with each new season; we simply build the next layer. As a testament to our design, we are capable of preserving the best of each season while rejecting the worst. The human heart is shockingly resilient. We need to get better at permission and grace.”

The pictures are packed up now, leaving bare walls and lots of nail holes my husband never knew about because, well, why measure when you can just eyeball distance, even if you suck at it! I didn’t take the time to count, but I’m pretty sure there were at least five or six holes behind each picture!

But I digress…

It has become clear to me that I have been stuck in the past. God tells us to stay out of there and move on, trusting Him every step of the way. The past certainly formed my identity to this point, and I am grateful for all of its lessons. But that’s not the end of my story or my journey. Hatmaker says, “You can care about new things and new beginnings and new people. Carry on, sister!” Carry on, indeed!

God wants me, wants all of us, to boldly step into each new day, believing every life experience, good or bad, will influence how we impact our world. Our loving God has created our most outlandishly gifted, magnificently designed selves for that very purpose.

It’s time to grab onto the desire of my heart that has been sitting too long and aching to be acknowledged, that one passion refusing to fade away no matter how much I have tried to ignore it.

Life Does Not Always Suck – Pass it on!

Featured by Linda Russell, posted in "Experiencing" God, coronavirus, Do Something, fear, For such a time as this, hope, Using our gifts

(originally posted 10/06/2020)

Joe Newman is 107 years old. Anita Sampson, who recently celebrated her 100th birthday, is Joe’s fiancée (you read that right). Joe said he has survived two World Wars, the 1918 Flu Pandemic, and the Great Depression. His advice after reflecting on all he has lived through? “Always look on the bright side. Don’t spend time worrying about what’s going to happen since what will happen will happen.” He says the coronavirus is just another event in his life and believes we should look forward to whatever time we have, be it years, weeks, or just days, and then hope for another one. Maybe work on those wedding plans – or not. (Anita has reportedly demanded a “Promise” ring by Tuesday, or she’s moving back to her own rocker!) But, for now, it’s nap time.

Since there are now so many American Centenarians, there have been several studies regarding these 100+-year-old folks. They all have survived so much. They have lived through misery, hunger, job loss, financial ruin, the loss of loved ones, and every imaginable heartache along the way. But that’s not the whole story. There are also beauty and blessings intermingled with suffering.

The most common and inspiring thread was just as I suspected. During the Depression, people who went beyond simply surviving learned to support and care for each other. They were generous with a few extra dollars, food from their gardens, and emotional support. Many discovered a deep well of strength and optimism that carried them beyond those tough times. They had a shared sense of gratitude, kindness toward others, and even a feeling of being blessed in the midst of unimaginable hardships. They learned acceptance of circumstances you cannot control. And hope – always hope.

Today they will tell you that happiness and fulfillment come from helping others; having a positive and optimistic attitude. Most have a strong faith and a deep commitment and passion for a cause beyond themselves. And now, here we are in the midst of one of our most difficult and challenging times, and our young people are suffering. What can we pass on from the wisdom of what is known as the Greatest Generation and our own life experiences?

I believe those of us who have not simply survived but, against all odds, have thrived during this screwed-up mess called human life are not finished yet. We have a calling, a responsibility actually, to share those experiences with younger generations in these desperate, seemingly hopeless times. We owe it to them. We have a treasure trove of stories I believe they are hungry for.

I’m not close to 100, except for those achy things that are the bane of my existence. But in my seventy-one years, I have learned so much about the ugliness and beauty of the human condition, about reality and resilience. I have experienced joy and sorrow, loss and pain and grief, and epic moments of delight and wonder and unexplainable joy. I hate and love, horde and give generously, fear and throw caution to the wind.

One moment I close in on myself, and another, I can open up with compassion and empathy for the brokenness that surrounds me. I’m a mixed bag of pride and humility. I can be your biggest fan or your most vocal adversary. I can be quiet and reflective or noisy and blow things up. I’m confusing, even to myself! I think that makes me human, albeit a very messy, bewildering human, like everyone else – if everyone else were honest. Anne Lamott says it beautifully, “Everyone is screwed up, broken, clingy, and scared. So there’s no sense wanting to be differently screwed up than you already are.”

What we are dealing with today: a failing economy, children going to bed hungry, job losses, Covid, wildfires, hurricanes, racial tensions, protests, and violence in the streets is nothing new. But, all at once? Good Lord! Think about all those younger than us that have not lived long enough to feel any sense of hope for their future because they have not had much of a past to draw that hope from, and from the statistics, few of them have faith in God either.

I believe we are in the midst of our collective dark night of the soul, and there’s a double whammy for those younger generations that have not found religion, or even God, to be relevant. They have rejected a religion based on duty and obligation. No thanks.

Religion, as we have come to know it since the first century, has always been top-down and authoritarian. But that is not God’s way. He sent Jesus on a mission to show his steadfast, unwavering love to the lost and broken. I have openly admitted that I have given up on the Institutional Church, but I have not given up on God or my faith, which is couched in awe and wonder at the marvels of all of creation.

Jesus didn’t wander the streets playing whack-a-mole with anyone who didn’t follow the rules, memorize rote prayers, or tithe 10%. When he said, “follow me”, he didn’t mean act virtuous, he meant be virtuous. Be kind and gentle and caring to your brothers and sisters that suffer life’s cruelties. Consider these verses: Jesus touched the blind man (Mark 8:22), he touched the deaf and mute man (Mark 7:33), he touched the leper (Matthew 8:3). The gentle, compassionate, loving touch of Jesus is what we are called to emulate.

I’m not gonna lie, it can be scary! Reaching out will require some risk and could result in ridicule or rejection from others. Hum…isn’t that what Jesus accepted to his death? Do you think for one moment that Jesus or the countless martyrs throughout history went to their deaths for a bargain-basement god? Would you?

Surely God put wisdom and gray hair together for a reason. Like Esther, we were made for such a time as this. People are scared and hurting. We have been there and hopefully have experienced the love and healing power of God. Every life has a story, and those are stories that must be told. If your story begins and ends with you, we all lose a bit of God’s glory.

So, what is your story? How have you overcome hurt and pain? How have you hurt others? How have you prevailed over life’s disappointments? How do you find joy and peace in these trying times? I Peter 3:15 tells us to “always be ready to give an explanation to anyone who asks you for a reason for your hope.” Are you ready?

People today, especially young people, are living out of fear instead of the abundance of life God has promised each of us. What we fail to understand is that it isn’t God being the mean, authoritarian father that is holding back on us. It’s us holding back. It’s us not believing our story matters. I truly feel this is a remarkable time for us old folks who are still hanging around to get ourselves off our rockers and into the fray. Why should we bother? Do they even want to hear from us? Well, you decide:

Let’s focus on what young adults (ages 18-25) are dealing with in this frightening and uncertain time:

Jeffrey Arnett, a psychologist at Clark University, says, “The pandemic struck students at a particularly vulnerable age.” He explains that this is “a time of life when many different directions remain possible, when little about the future has been decided for certain, when the scope of independent exploration of life’s possibilities is greater for most people than it will be at any other period of the life course.”

So, picture these young people that have likely never before experienced even one of the many crises we’re facing today. They have had their certainties about life jerked out from under them without any warning.

Perhaps there is a glimmer of hope. In one study, young people said they were empowered by forming connections, but they admitted they did not always know how to form them. Psychologists at the University of Manchester have found another factor critical to young adults’ resiliency — the strength of their social bonds able to provide them with the support needed to weather the worst storms. Check this out for inspiration: https://www.nunsandnones.org/

So, as their lives seem to be falling apart, that leaves a huge gap to be filled, a gap between their current reality and hope. And that’s where God can use us to step in if dancing in the midst of tragedy is our specialty. There, of course, is a hurdle to jump first (not that God isn’t the world’s best hurdle jumper!). They don’t think much of religion or God or the pain of Judgment Day…..Ohhhh, don’t get me started on “God’s gonna-take-you-to-the-woodshed on Judgment Day”! Let’s quickly move on…

A study from National Catholic Reporter asks: “Why are young Catholics going, going, gone?” Since we know it’s not just Catholics that have left their faith, this is very telling for all young adults that feel disenfranchised and left to their own devices to find their way. “Whether it’s feelings of being judged by religious leaders who don’t know or understand them, or being forced by their parents to attend church, or witnessing the sexual abuse scandal and the hypocrisy of church hierarchy, young people are expressing a desire both to break free from organized religion and to be part of a community. As emerging adults continue to navigate a difficult period, it is crucially important that they are able to maintain wellbeing and seek support where needed from those around them.” https://www.ncronline.org/news/parish/study-asks-why-are-young-catholics-going-going-gon

“Belonging before believing” may be the key to all of this! The Institutional Church teaches “rules” necessary to live as a “good” person of faith is expected to. That rigid voice has become old and tiresome, void of meaning and purpose. It cannot address the longing of a soul that knows deep down it belongs to something bigger, something more.

Where do we see in any of Jesus’ teachings to the masses gathered everywhere he went that he stopped mid-sermon for an alter call? “Look, guys, we know you’re hungry after walking for miles and sitting here in the heat for hours. The food trucks won’t be coming any time soon…BUT…we’ve got fish! Come on up and get yourselves saved, and you get some!”

Years ago, when I was a youth minister, one of the most basic truths that I grew to understand about human longing and relationships came from one statement, “I don’t care how much you know until I know how much you care.”

I didn’t have any idea what I was doing when I first got some teens in our church together to start a youth group. Truth be told, I was probably needier than they were, but I sincerely wanted to give them a place to gather, safely question anything about their faith (when Father wasn’t within earshot), serve the community, and have fun. Granted, I suffered the pains of having an A.D.D. brain that called into question my “fly by the seat of your pants” leadership style. More than one parent informed me how unorganized I was – thank you very much. Of course, they were too busy to help.

But here’s the thing: not one of the kids walked away because a meeting was rescheduled due to a bit of forgetfulness by one flighty adult. Not one kid complained when said flighty adult was the only one who thought an icebreaker consisting of sticking life savers on someone’s face was funny. I still think that one’s funny! But, oh well. (Note to self: teenager = insecurity. Got it.) They forgave my every misstep as we all learned together. Why? Because they knew I loved them. That’s it. That’s all that mattered…well…except that I made some badass cookies!

I recall a young pastor we had, new out of seminary. He came to a meeting one night and later complained that there were only ten kids there. So, why did we bother? I didn’t see that one coming and had no reply for him until a few days later. I invited a therapist to come speak to the kids about suicide: how to recognize it and what to do if they suspected a friend was at risk. One of the “just ten kids” at that meeting called me a couple of days later to thank me – like sobbing thanking me – for having her there. He got her phone number afterward and called her because he was contemplating suicide. They began therapy sessions with his mom. I still get teary when I think about that.

We all have life’s most critical and basic questions that need to be answered if we are to live fully the lives we were meant to live. Who am I? Why am I here? What is God’s purpose for me? Are you someone that can help young people answer those questions? You can, you know, just by being present to them, listening to them, and trusting God. Knowing he has already given you all the tools you need to fulfill your own destiny – you can now help them do the same.

What if Good Friday was Cancelled?

April 10, 2020February 1, 2025 by Linda Russell, posted in Easter, Good Friday, Holy Saturday

What if Good Friday was canceled like all other “big events”? The need to manage crowd control during this time would take priority.

Well, then, Holy Saturday would be canceled too. Even if you spent that day alone in your Upper Room, there would be nothing to wait for.

And then, of course, no need for Easter.

BUT WAIT…

This could be our most profound Holy Week ever! Okay, maybe not “ever” – the original one would trump it.

But, we have an opportunity to make this EPIC for our lifetime if we’re paying attention!

Good Friday:

Throughout Jesus’ Passion, God remained eerily silent. Jesus was mocked by those who were certain he was an impostor. “If you are the Son of God, why doesn’t he save you? Why don’t you just come down from that cross?” (Matt. 27:40)

Yet, when “it was finished,” God’s heart exploded with the reality of his beloved Son’s death. The torn curtain, the earthquake, the rocks splitting! The eruption of Love’s broken heart slumped over on the cross was humankind’s ultimate rejection of God’s ultimate Love. What Jesus’ death revealed most profoundly was that God and Jesus’ mutual self-giving was completely gratuitous. “Surely He was the Son of God.” (Matt. 27-54)

And for us today? Good Friday seems to be happening every day since the pandemic began. I don’t know about you but I wake up every morning, open the shades, and look out the window expecting the world to be different. But, the news tells us it’s not. (Call it our very own Groundhog Day).

I think the significance of this Good Friday for us is that, as bad as it is, we know this too will pass, and God will use this tragedy for his good if we will just trust him and cooperate with his plan. We have been blessed with the opportunity of a do-over if we are so inclined to take it on.

Holy Saturday…and we wait. Truth be told, we spend most of our lives waiting for something. Our lives seem to be suspended between the really bad days and a sprinkling of a few really good days, that life presents to us like an endless loop of obsessive rumination, good or bad.

Fear and despair abound in today’s world. How is it possible to find hope or trust in anything, let alone a God who seems distant from human suffering?

Maybe we don’t know how many lives will be lost, what the economic outcome will be, how long it will be before life returns to “normal”, and even how differently we might view our “normal”. But, we do know Easter is coming! HALLELUJAH AND AMEN!

Easter Sunday – Our celebration of the Risen Christ will surely be much different than we have ever experienced before. What I am hoping and praying for is that we honestly access our new reality in light of how we live our precious lives going forward. God’s will is made clear through his Son, “Love as I have loved and forgive as I have forgiven, no matter the cost.” And we dare not cling to ignorance when the Truth stands before us.

How will we celebrate the Risen Christ in the midst of the fear and despair in today’s world? Holy week is always a reminder that we are called to live differently. But, when people in need see our backs turned from them, they see God’s back as well. It may seem too scary to accept that we are to be God’s compassion, his touch, and his mercy. So, we cry out to him to, “do something” forgetting that we are to be his hands and feet. We stand on Holy Ground when our compassionate care embraces another’s suffering.

This is the point where we must ask ourselves, “Does faith in Jesus orient my life?” If God is present and active in Jesus, is the same true about me? And if so, does that not call for an immediate response? God’s Love can release our human potential beyond our imagining, but not without our “yes”.

Jesus’ question, “Who do you say I am?” will be answered by our falling on our knees in awe and adoration, yes. But it cannot stop there. Jesus never said, “Worship me”. He said, “follow me.” As a Christian, I answer his question every time I give of myself for the sake of another, or, conversely, care more for myself than my neighbor. If I say to Christ, “you are the living God,” that truth must be manifest in and through the way I live my life, or it is a lie.

I am sure the next question Jesus will confront me with is, “Do you love me?” How will my life answer that question?

Search

Tag: hope

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Perfectly Imperfect

It’s to Die For: Caring for the Poor in an Age of Consumerism

Only Man/Woman can Prove that God is Love

Empowering Faith in a Secular World

The Journey to Realness: Transforming Pain into Beauty

Finding Peace in Uncertainty: Trusting God

Finding Hope in Crisis: Lessons from History

Never, Never, Never Give Up!

A Call to Grandparents: Now is Our Time!

My Journey to Finding True Purpose and Self-Acceptance

God’s Audacious Promise of Hope Always Fulfilled

Learning from Moses: Embracing Responsibility and Change

“Bad” Kids and “Hopeless” Saints

Death – Our Uninvited Teacher

Failure Will Not Have the Last Word

If Not Us…Then Who?

Acting ‘As If’: A Path to Healing and Growth

Life Does Not Always Suck – Pass it on!

What if Good Friday was Cancelled?

INDEED!

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