Here I go putting my vast expanse of self-proclaimed wisdom out there for everyone to see. Because – why not?! I’ve decided that in our current cultural mess, where everyone seems to be scrambling for attention and significance, something, or better still, “Someone,” is clearly missing.
The wide spectrum of beliefs and answers to our current problems are mind-boggling. And deep down, much of it is a visceral hatred that spreads all over social media and in our own backyards.
We all seem to have a sense of what “should be” in our personal lives, our neighbors’ lives, our culture, and even with God – yeah, let’s not let God off the hook!
I should, you should, we should, they should, God should, trees should, rocks should, animals should, the weather should.
My boss should be nicer, my kids should be more respectful, my husband should do the laundry, my hair should be thicker, my waist thinner (deep exhale).
Have I left anything out?
We are obsessed with how our lives should be and how others should act. We calculate daily what ought to be, almost moment-by-moment, and then adjust our lives accordingly.
Let’s say I call you out on social media because, well, you’re an idiot, and someone has to do it. Then, I see you’ve done something even more reprehensible the next day. You should then be arrested, or at the very least, get a massive dose of eczema right before a long-anticipated summer holiday and have to wear sweatpants the entire time! There, take that!
What if, one day, you were given the power to enact all the most profound shoulds you have ever imagined? What would they be? There’s a pretty broad range here, so let’s make three categories:
- My shoulds.
- God’s shoulds
- Everyone else’s shoulds.
I’ll start:
My shoulds, being honest here – which sucks. But they probably won’t materialize anyway:
- I should be more loving and less judgmental.
- I should spend less time on the internet and more time with God.
- I should quit counting offenses against me and begin counting my blessings.
- I should be more like Jesus and less like a “Christian” who’s superior to everyone else.
- I should quit calling people “idiots”.
- Chocolate should not be fattening(oops, how did that get in there?).
God’s shoulds:
- God should not allow suffering – especially for Christians.
- God should punish all mean people – except me.
- God should ignore my pompous attitude even though it runs totally counter to everything Jesus stands for.
- God should reward me every time I correct someone’s behavior.
Everyone else’s shoulds:
- People should be more generous and less self-serving (except me).
- Wicked people should not prosper.
- People should love and accept each other.
- My neighbor should only put his trash out on trash day and make his dog stop pooping in my yard. (Yeah, I know it’s you!)
But wait; is this truly what we were made for? Is this what fulfills us and gives our lives meaning and purpose?
It seems we have gotten so caught up in demands, rules, and checklists (let’s not forget) were initiated by man, not God, that we have forgotten who and Whose we are. We must reclaim our innate call to love because of who we are in Christ.
We seem to have lost our way in a culture that is hell-bent on dividing us into opposing camps: those who deserve the best life has to offer and those who don’t. We have replaced decency and justice with one-upping our “enemies”.
We could argue and debate all day long, but that will not change anything. What’s needed more than anything is (1) we come to truly believe and live as though we are beloved children of a loving God, and (2) that we answer Jesus’ call to “Go and love on everyone you meet. No exceptions. No judgments. No prerequisites.”
Do you want a real challenge to get you started? – actually, if you’re like me, it will be ongoing! It’s terrifyingly simple: sit quietly with God – no agenda, no list of demands, no attempts to excuse your transgressions. Be quiet and listen so God can transcend your stubborn will. It is there where He will speak into your messiness and transform that hardened heart.
De. Barbara Holmes tells us, “There is within the human spirit a source of renewal, courage, and ingenuity that equips us to fulfill our purpose here on earth.”
And here’s something I know for sure because I experience it almost daily: when you lose your way – and you will, when you fall back into old habits – and you will, and when you doubt your worth, God’s love, compassion, grace, and forgiveness are steadfast. He’s never left you and never will.
And, finally, I’m sorry I called you an “idiot”! Please forgive me!
PASSION, PURPOSE & POOPYHEADS 