In the immortal words of Mike Tyson, “Everyone has a plan till you get punched in the face”. That, I believe, is the moment you realize those plans are not serving you well, that your life is out of control, and no one is coming to rescue you.
Sooooo….
- You have to take control of your own life if you want to start waking up to your purpose.
- You will never have a good relationship with anyone until you change your relationship with yourself. That requires honesty and self-love.
We are so skilled at blaming others for our unhappiness: an abusive parent, that mean third-grade teacher, God, whoever.
Looking in the mirror is not an option because that would be way too scary. Instead, we allow our ego to run roughshod over us and keep us under its control. But looking in the mirror is the starting point to change.
It’s like standing on burning coals, crying out to God to take away the pain, and then being angry with him for not doing it. Just move your damn feet!
Vance Morgan speaks to our flaws and faults we try to hide, “ … What if there are some parts of my “self” that I hide because I don’t like them because they might reveal character flaws and weaknesses that I would prefer no one know about?” Never mind that everyone does know about them. They’re pretty obvious by the way we interact with others.
And besides, we all have flaws and faults. We can sit in judgment of everyone who makes messes in our lives. But at the end of the day, we must turn that anger toward our own sinfulness.
Years ago, I read a book by Cherie Carter-Scott titled, “IF LIFE is a GAME, THESE are the RULES”. She explains that our life’s lessons are repeated as often as it takes to learn them. Then, we can move on to new lessons.
Those people in your life who seem to hurt your feelings repeatedly? Lessons.
Those people who get on your last nerve? Lessons.
If we are willing to reflect on the triggers they cause, we will see what the universe constantly tries to show us.
Believe me, after all the years that I whined and cried about the unfairness of my life, of the constant dumping of other people’s crap into my lap, I could finally see I was reacting to the actions of others that reside within myself. It wasn’t pretty.
When it finally became too much to bear, and I fell into the grace of God with all the humility I could muster (which wasn’t much), something unexpectedly changed my focus and, in turn, my life. It began with my working with teenagers who, truth be told, I didn’t even like very much at the time.
I started a youth group at my church, thinking I would be doing them a favor. Aren’t I awesome, and don’t you love me to pieces because I’m doing this for you? It took God a while to get through my hard head as to why I was doing it. I needed my hurting ego fed. But the kids were very accommodating, and my ego was getting all the attention it longed for – until it wasn’t. It was pretty pathetic.
When you invest so much time and energy in something so shallow it inevitably collapses in on itself. Which is what happened to me. Then, there was a sudden breakthrough concerning the immense difference between taking and giving. Constantly taking is draining, while giving without expectations is fulfilling beyond imagining.
I believe it was then that I grew to love those, sometimes obnoxious, teens for no reason except that God loved them. That moment changed the trajectory of my life and showed me that I indeed had a purpose, that I was not the center of the universe, and the only person making me miserable was – well – me.
Though my purpose has changed and evolved over the years, the fullness of heart I feel comes only from God and from listening to him. Even when I wonder if he has lost his mind!
My life, thus far, has been an amazing and often surprising adventure. It has not been without its share of heartaches and disappointments. But through it all, God has never left me, or misguided or disappointed me.
So, if you are in a place in your life where you feel stuck in your messiness and trapped in your hurt and anger towards others you think have ruined your life – I implore you to stop. God has a plan for you. I know that for a fact. He’s waiting for you to let go of that over-burdening ego and allow him to guide your life. You will not regret it.
Those God wants to send you to serve are waiting and hoping for exactly what your gifts can bring into their lives. And isn’t that better than being continually “punched in the face”?!
PASSION, PURPOSE & POOPYHEADS 